Friday the 21st - Saturday the 22nd - Sunday the 23rd - Monday the 24th
The contributions in all parts of this real-time article were written by the following beings:
Richard of the Amazing Cracking Conspiracy, Tanis of The CareBears (Coprophagic Necrocannibal Eviscerator of Alcoholica), Sammy Joe of The Lost Boys, Manikin of The Lost Boys, Spaz of The Lost Boys (Toxic Foetus Eater of Alcoholica), Stefan (Digital Insanity of The Lost Boys), Mit of NEXT, Chris of The Garlic Eaters, Red of Omega, Bluestar of Sync, Eric, Zae of Next, Perceval of Zuul of The Pact, Fury of Legacy, Chaos Inc. of Delta Force, New Mode of Delta Force, CIA of Galtan Six, Cugel of Silents, The Flying Egg of Omega, Acco of The Garlic Eaters, Crystar of the Pendragons, Dogue de Mauve from the Overlanders, Flynn from Hysteria, Mopy of Ghost Genius of Hysteria Alliance, Furyo of the Overlanders, Silver of the Pendragons of Triton Development, Psychoreal of Hysteria, Klaus of ST Connexion, Mega Cribb, Ian 'Dave Clone' of the Watchmen, Rob Povey, The Fate of The Unlimited Matrix, Gunstick of The Unlimited Matrix, Robert (RX2 of MPH), Steve (Miz of MPH), An Cool of The Carebears, IKI of Hysteria, Vantage, Ford Perfect, Thor of the Black Monolith Team, Genital Grinder of Alcoholica (previously Sprog of The Lost Boys), Chris of the Watchmen, Paul (Zeus of Teknique), Vomited Anal Tract of Alcoholica (though he may be mentioned earlier already under another name - there's no way to be sure), HAQ of Omega, Martijn (Lucifer of The Spirits of Doom), Roland (TS of the Spirits of Doom), Marlon of ST Connexion, The Nutty Snake of Aenigmatica, Phil of MPH, Relayer of the Quartermass Experiment of Aenigmatica, Crush, Zokathra, Terence of the Pendragons, Nemrod of the Pendragons, Fishbone from the Vegetables, Doclands of the Overlanders, STWARS of Next, Ziggy Stardust of the Overlanders, Tyrem of the Respectables, Gudul and Adso (that's 62 people, of which one may have been mentioned twice).
It should be noted that the people who wrote this were usually tired, irresponsible, intoxicated by the fame they relished among the select few, and generally crazy. Some of the stuff to be seen beyond this point is not for the squeamish or people otherwise of a feeble-minded persuasion.
Everybody is responsible for what he has written, and the ST NEWS editorial staff does not accept any responsibility for what has been written anywhere - except for the bits written by themselves.
It is our duty to inform you, dear reader, of the fact that large parts of this text may be considered 'shocking' or even 'obscene'.
Sorry. We decided to use no censorship.
(And here the proceedings take to your senses)
00:02
Yeah - the party has officially begun. Well, in theory anyway. Pooh what's that smell?
Manikin
00:05
An overly disappointed Stefan has returned just now, and it turns out that he has failed to find a resort for the Frenchies to stay the night: The hotel is full (sounds a bit like Christmas at Bethlehem).
So now, as I wrote earlier, we're in for some 'deep improvisation'. Of the deepest conceivable kind.
Richard
00:07
They seem to be going anyway. Another hotel in the southern part of Holland, I guess. But I leave the details up to Stefan, who will no doubt get another go at this keyboard somewhere along the line.
I really feel that I am writing a bit too much here, but you have to do something don't you?
What?
Should I better go and do something else?
Well, buncha thanks for that!
Richard
00:13
At the moment I am being atacked by two coders for some graphixx, but of course they're so thick they have not noticed I don't have an ST...
Spaz
00:15
Well, I found a hotel for the French guys (who turned out to be some members of Next), but when Gerrit Jan came back he volunteered once again to have these people at his house too. A smile formed on my weary face and like so many times before I am indebted to somebody. I'm happy now!! (But I would love to get to bed though...)
By the way, I'd better explain what Nick and Fabian are coding at the moment since Richard's tiny brain is not able to cope with it. It is supposed to be a 2 screens high scrolline (four planes) that bounces along, overlapped by a 3 screen high TLB/TCB logo that moves up and down. All in 16 colors, fully masked and everything, with a digi sound player and in 1 VBL. Sync scrolling, preprogramming etc. etc. Andreas (Jas) just suggested that they probably wouldn't be able to do it, but knowing Nick and Fabian, it will work at some time...
Stefan
00:25
Well at long fucking last I finally got Spaz to do some bloody graphics for me, not bad - it only took 7 hours to persuade him this time and if he says that he did not have a computer then he is bullshitting because he certainly had one for a very long period of time earlier in the evening. Grafix artists, who fucking needs them..!!!!
(A programmer maybe? ED.)
Manikin
00:46
It's the German again.
Manikin and Zae are just having an immensely funny argument! They are still talking about whether Zae will have a screen from the Lost Boys for their "Phaleon Demo" or not, but I can tell you now already, that they will not get the screen as Manikin has made up his mind a long time ago, but there are other coders in TLB, who are very very busy. Spaz baby is occupying my harddisk plus computer so I can't do any work for "Maggie" (the disk magazine of TLB, ED.), which results in me writing for this other great disc magazine called ST NEWS (great mag !), but hopefully we will finish "Maggie" in time still.
INTERRUPT
PRINT " BURP, BUUUUUUURP"
RTE
This was the immensly bold Richard being a pain in the arse making funny noises across on the other table. Rob finally managed (after about 5 hours hard work) to get the monitor lead working (I just wonder for how long!). Delta Force is still trying to work out how this dreaded machine called an Amiga works! I just hope that he will work it out for his sake; it is not too good for the health of an ST user to spend too much time on this piece of lame....
I was just told by Richard to FUCK OFF, so I'll better leave you.
Michael S.
01:01
So it's the Richster again on ze keez. Stefan and Gerrit Jan are now preparing to leave, taking selected persons with them for some serious napping.
Time is surely not being soft on us, and I was kinda startled to notice that it was this late already. We (or at least I) have to drive back to Stefan's place to do some sleeping and tomorrow (later today, actually) there will be the rest (of the party).
There's lots of things we still have to do before we can start off...
Richard
11:34
Phoow.
So I guess the ST NEWS International Christmas Coding Convention has now officially started.
Approximately thirty people are now present here, in an office of ITC (SPC Training, the educational division of SPCC where Stefan works) in Oss. It is slightly hectic, but I think I can tell you just about who I have seen here today.
First, of course, there's the people that were here yesterday already. Added to that, I think I have spotted Sync and Omega (about six or seven people who are at the moment getting their computers over here, who are all Swedish), TGE (who are sitting next to me I'm afraid), Michael B. (TNT-Crew), Erik (ES of TEX), Karsten (Unicorn or something)...I even thing I saw some more people, but the general hectic of it all doesn't make sure I'm certain about anything.
Stefan and Next are now dragging a bit of Coke up here - I guess we'll be needing those before the day is over.
Before I do anything else, I should maybe mention what happened after the previous entry, which was conceived at one past one last night.
Well, Stefan helped Gerrit Jan to get some of the Frenchies and TLB over to his place, and I went directly for Stefan's place with Fabian, Phil(ip) and Thorsten. Stefan was to follow later with The CareBeings. I slept amazingly well, and I even had some breakfast before I headed towards the ITC office - where this entry was started (so the rest is history).
I guess I'd better piss off now. Maybe someone else can have a go at the keys. First, I have to organise paper and a marker pen to write lotsa stuff on and hang around. Wow.
Richard
11:40
Hi, here is MIT of NeXT, we (the French guys) are very interested by this country, because there are many (many!) lovely girls. And all the good looking girls smile at us, just
because we are speaking in French.
We are in a very cool place, but we've got a problem: We've got an ST but no monitors left... The demo competition has begun, but without an ST we can't code!!
Richard is writing the rules of the demo competion on a board on the wall. Hum... 3.5 Kbytes on disk...it must be finished on Sunday at 17:00...arf... let's go.
MIT
12:02
Coke yeah! So here we are! The real Garlic Eaters from the real Black Forest. We (Chris, Nick and Acco) arrived here in Oss this morning at 9:00 am. So now we are sitting around here on the second floor of a building somewhere in this lovely town full of so much nice and beautiful girls. It's strange - for me, they look all the same, so far! I think Sammy Joe, Zae and me will make some great connections this evening and I think we'll also be real pissed of...
But don't worry - we're used to it, I can tell you... So I'm out of ideas now. Bye, bye, ...
Chris of TGE
12:28
So. The first day of the convention has started! Sod! A lot of Swedes has arrived, but then, who gives a fuck. All Swedish crews except TCB are anal intrusions! May they die wanking!
What about doing some serious work now...
Coprophagic Necrocannibal Eviscerator
12:35
Last night was completely shit as we had to sleep with some smelly French gits who smelt like they had garlic and onions stuck up there fucking dicks, and now there are even more fuckin' French, German, Swedish and Dutch lame arseholes here.
At the moment there is a fat neo nazi Dutchman standing next to me and it looks like a dog with pus oozing from his anal muscle has just vomited on his head, his name is Dick...
Toxic Foetus Eater...
12:40
It looks like some of the younger persons present in this room are being slightly obnoxious and are writing extremely silly things in this wonderful real time article. I think I have to whack a few heads together and squeeze some pitiful necks until their little eyeballs pop out. As a matter of fact, one of the more rancid of the two is now urging me to piss off so he can spill forth some more of his atrocious brain-vomit.
Stefan
12:45
Actually stefan was wrong as I also think that the stuff that was written before was very childish and stupid so I think it should stop...
Spaz
12:47
Fuckin poofter......
Toxic
12:49
Oh dear. Spaztic's spelling really sucks! How come an ordinary Englishman can't spell properly? May all assholes be lacerated and left to bleed on the.... Got to stop, Spaztic wants to write something.
INTERRUPT
Slightly angry editor note: These spelling mistakes (like 'there' in the bit written at 12:35, which should of course be 'their') are really shit because A) They're made by an English person, and B) They are referred to later, which makes sure I have to de-spell them after having correcting them already!!
RTE
Tanister
12:50
TLB has just got a new name: It is Total Laceration of Bears so I'm just off to mutilate Tanis' Body...
Spaz
12:51
ØØØØØØØRK!
TFE
12:55
THE TERRIBLE OMEGA has arrived after a menacing 12 hours in our fucking rented car.
Red
13:00
Just now, the Galtan Six dudes have arrived. There are three of them, but only two of them are, like, really staying over until the hard core hours of fun and (even more) fun arrive. They are Diederik (CIA), Serv� and someone who calls himself the Obliterator of the Powerslaves (that's an Amiga freak, actually, and thus very probably not even one of the aforemeant Galtan Six dudes - sorry).
So it's slowly getting busier and busier here, and that also means that we're slowly getting in some entrance money that makes sure that we can buy more Coke and FOOD.
Yeah.
The Coke bottles that we fetched not too long ago have now already been consumed for more than half. I surely hope we'll survive all this...
Erik, Karsten and Thorsten are not here now. They left about an hour ago to find themselves some junk nourishment. Well....if that's what they want...
"Death by Cholesterol!"
Mucky Pup quote (they're not here, but it's appropriate)
Richard
13:05
The terrible SYNC has also arrived (as a matter of fact we came in the same rented car as "Omega"). Yeah!
Bluestar
13:10
Some of my esteemed colleagues have just dropped in to admire all the computer freaks around here. Linda sure made her entrance, a lot of male-computer-freak-eyes sortof swivelled around when she came in. Rob is standing behind me now, sheepishly laughing after I took over from him (he typed in the time of this entry). Apparently, his inspiration left him as soon as he sat down behind the keyboard to give his first impression.
Stefan
13:15
I just wondered what the average life time expectancy of a Coke-bottle is around here.
"Probably 1.34 nanoseconds..."
Stefan quote
Eric
13:18
Stefan failed to mention the fact (did I now? Stefan quote) that just now we had the entry of the first agreeable female (you can't really count the older women we had gazing into the room earlier). She's called Linda and you must have heard her name before as she is one of Stefan's esteemed colleagues. She brings a fresh tinge to the...
Interrupt: I have shit in my eyes. He did mention her. But nonetheless.
...air that is filled with second-hand oxygen and assorted smells arising from the feet of those who have taken the liberty of taking off their shoes. I don't know which brand it is, but I have to make a mental note not to forget to ask her one day, as I guess this scent would match my girlfriend too.
Richard
13:35
I have the idea that it will be quite busy here soon. I heard something about Maxi and Dom of The Replicants coming - and Stefan nor me seem to recall having invited them. Maxi would come here as a coder (not a cracker) and Dom would be here as (you'll never believe it) a publisher.
My God - what are we up to when crackers go and publish? But maybe I shouldn't say anything about this...
Good. I surely hope more people will write here (hint hint).
Richard
13:47
Pfuiii! Believe me or not, it was a fuckin' dangerous night we had: Sleeping near Sammy Joe (without his shoes on...), and Sprog farting all the night is an experience that makes a man know what life really is. A lot of people are here now. One can meet various people walking around here: Sync, Omega, TLB, TCB, Aenigmatica, Thalion's guys and some others...
By the way: it took us (ZAE, Manikin and Alexis) 2 hours to walk nearly 100 metres (from the SPCC castle to the ITC office).
Now you know what happens when you start following girls in a town you don't know - you get lost!
The Lost Boys really deserve their name...
INTERRUPTION: FRENCHIES ARRIVED!!!!!!!!!!
Zae
14:07
Indeed, indeed, as Zae aptly noticed. Twenty-fucking-two of 'em and they're all armed to the teeth with various parts of computer equipment, brabbling French all the time. I think I saw various Overlanders, Fury (Fabrice, the man with the unfeasibly smelly socks) and some more (Pendragons). I really lost track in the amount of people and the incredible smell of garlic and stuff like that (or was it my imagination?).
Well. First, we've got to get them seated somewhere. We just got control of a third room here, and they'll be going there. French territory from now on, ruled by the guillotine and all that shit.
I'm beginning to talk bullshit now so I'd better quit (Oh gosh that was a bit of rhyme but I will not start being poetic just now).
Richard
14:20
Well finally we reached Holland after two days travelling by train. It was quite hard because of Fury's smelling socks, but we got here. There's:
Overlanders 7
Pendragons 4 or 5
Legacy 1 (already too much)
Zuul ! 1 (me)
Next 1
Tool 8 1
M Coder 1
Well there's two kinds of people: Coders who are speaking about coding and the others having a good time. Well, here are some charts:
Most noisy man Sammy Joe
Sleeping man Ziggy (he almost missed the train because he wanted to finish the "European Demos" at home but there were bugs everywhere, no screens are working, etc. etc. Well perhaps today we will see "Syntax Terror", another demo that is supposed to be finished here by the Delta Force)
Well so long; I'm tired of this German keyboard.
Perceval
14:26
Puh, I'm (Chris of TGE) back on the keys again. We just visited the town a bit and found some great record shops (one single CD for only 3,-- Dutch guilders. Great isn't it?). So, you have to know that I'm totally finished coz I saw lotsa nice girls and I just came out of the swimming-pool that I visited just now. It's just about 200 meters from here, but I think that I'm the only one who went there... So...
(So?! ED.)
Chris of TGE
14:35
Hi there! So here is the unforgettable Fury and his mega smelly feet (God knows why they all complain?). Anyway, I changed shoes so I won't be smelling anymore. The journey to the STNICCC was quite long - 11 hours in a train is always long I guess.
I've got nothing else to tell ya except that I'm anxiously awaiting the arival of ULM ('You A Lame')
See ya in a next message...
Fury signing off (by the way, I'm no more a Replicant member; I left the crew and made mine: Legacy)... Bye...
14:47
Now it starts: Delta Force has arrived. Here is Chaos, Inc. penetrating the keyboard. I'm desperately seeking for some German guys, because my English is not the best. There are already a lot of guys around here, mainly speaking English. But now enough for today. Maybe I'm continuing later.
Tonight the "Syntax Terror" demo will be released, and so a Great Work is ended. Enough of this shit-talking...
CU.
Chaos, Inc. (DF)
14:58
The only problem here is the lack of an ST!!
Nothing to code or type except this computer.
Overlanders and Delta Force are now working, labouring, to finish their demos!
They will be great.
Perceval
15:07
You have no concept, dear reader, of the amount of work that is involved in the creating of a decent piece of text like Perceval's up here. When it's still in its raw form, it looks
like a couple of words added together is a strange way, with comma's where they don't belong and lacking semicolons where they should. Also, the English is pukably abhorrent as you can imagine. English must be very unimportant down in France, and it shows.
I really hope that more capable people will have a go at the keyboard, too. Like Chris of TGE, or even a couple of Englishmen. The good thing about the Frenchies writing, however, is that they have a totally different perspective (or scope or whatever) of writing and that adds to the appeal of this article.
But scheiße on that. I'd better sign off again as I have an idea that I can convince our dear mister Master Editor (Undead) to write a bit now.
Richard
15:13
DEEP SIGH.
This stuff is surely draining my life force. So many people around, hacking away on their computers, hanging around, talking in all sorts of languages. There is a constant murmur in the air, various fragments of computerized talk drift through the air, the languages get intertwined in one large mass of Babylonic confusion.
I am surrounded by empty coke bottles, Mark (The Genital Grinder) keeps jumping Richard. Overlanders, Lost Boys, Delta Forcers, CareBears, Overlanders, Pendragons, Garlic Eathers, Omegas, Syncs, Texers, Black Monolithians, Nexters, all moving around like bees in a hive. It's good fun really.
I set up a little corner of my own with a mattress and a pillow in it and soon I will retreat to it, I think. I just realized that in all the commotion, I forgot one little thing: Myself.
No fresh T-shirt, no soap, no toothbrush, no nothing. This means that I have to go to Den Bosch somewhere along the line to get all that. Damn.
Stefan
15:28
It is one of the most ultimately hard things currently conceivable, but I will go and try to describe who is doing what here.
I don't know if someone mentioned this before (and I am too lazy to find out by scrolling up and down through this article again) but the Dynamic Duo (from England) have arrived too. They are doing some coding now. Michael S. (Sammy Joe/Jo) is coding something for TLB's "Disk Maggie" (now thought to be called "Disk Major" or something), Genital Grinder is eating crisps and listening to a rather spiffin' Entombed CD ("Left Hand Path"),
Rob is sitting around with a glazy look in his eye, ES is looking Gogo over the shoulder who seems to be doing some Amiga (?!) artwork. Michael of TNT Crew is busy coding a 3.5 Kb demo screen involving a non-line-A polygon routine, the Delta Force members (Slime, Chaos and New Mode, that is) are standing around Galtan Six looking at something I can't see, and Questlord of TDF is playing "Tetris" on the Gameboy with Karsten (Unicorn).
Genital Grinder is softly banging his head, attracting the attention of Spaz (or TFE or whatever) who (I guess) is doing graphics.
Wait a moment.....I'm going over to room two...
(Pause while author walks to and fro room two)
...Sync and Omega (and a group called The Silents) are coding something that they described as 'a game'. Wait another moment...I'm going over to room three (the Bastille)...
No I'm not. Spaz just put on Sepultura's "Beneath the Remains" and that's REALLY FUCKING HEAVY!! AAARRGHH!
Now I'm checking out the Bastille...
(Pause while author walks to and fro room three)
...and I'm back.
It's quite a big room, and it's dipped in relative darkness as none of the Frenchies seem to have discovered 'light' or the mere concept of 'photons' or any other particles.
I was struck by the fact that about 25 persons were standing around a computer system manned by M-Coder, who appears to have written something revolutionary involving huge shapes of 3D polygons (including round ones). Looked OK to me. Mr. Bee was sitting forelorn coding something else, and it was the first time I didn't see Ziggy coding today (he started immediately after he arrived here).
The music that is shuddering us now here, I think, Entombed again. Some really heavy stuff - believe me.
Richard
15:38
We don't wanna be called "TDF" again, coz we are DELTA FORCE and not "THE DELTA FORCE" anymore.
New Mode
15:45
Well after a long time of me not writing anything I am going to not write anything again.
Spaz
15:51
Ziggy Stardust and the M.Coder showed their amazing 3D screen to Nick and Manikin...... They were amazed, but not as amazed as I thought they would be.
M.Coder said it would be very hard or impossible to beat dis because they were four to code this and it took 6 months!!!! Do you remember the 3D screen in the "Delirious Demo II" or in the "Union"??? This screen is beating them by a hundred times at least.
Let's say if you begin learning assembly language today on your own, it will take you at least 50 years to beat this.
So I asked the Overlanders to put one of Zuul's screens in the "European Demos", the most beautiful one - but there was no disk space left.....
Aren't you asleep?
So I lost my bet...
Next time when Fury speaks once again about his bloody feet, he'll do it (Er...what?! ED.).
Perceval
16:04
At the moment nothing is happening so I have decided to explain what is happening. Well, Tanis is drawing an STNICCC logo as I got pissed off with it, Batman and Robin are coding and so are Manikin, Genital Grinder and Bittner B-B-B-Bit-Bittner.
I'm going now...
Spaz
16:07
I am touched. My dearest of Master Editors just supplied me with "The Deeper Meaning of Liff" by means of Christmas gift (I returned the favour by giving him Adams' "Last Chance to See..."). I was touched into the utmost marrow of my bones, and tears were welling up inside of me, only being swallowed back just in time to avoid me being embarassed.
Karsten supplied me with a DIY Brontosaurus model and Dave and Tim gave me a Christmas card in which they apologised for spoiling my summer (during which we did "A Prehistoric Tale" for Thalion). As a matter of fact, I spoilt their summer but whatever.
I am going down to a silent place to contemplate about my gifts and the shuddering feeling of it almost being Christmas already.
Two people of Hotline just arrived (there will be more, they say). These two are called Lotus and Joard (what a name).
Well.
Richard
16:13
I just had some food and I suddenly feel considerably better than I did about 1 hour ago. Just now I saw a 3D demo by Ziggy Stardust and M-Coder plus some other guy whose name I did not catch. They were very proud of the demo, and rightly so. The design and objects in it were really well thought out. The routines were really fast too, but not that fast, they still don't know a few tricks that I do and that I know Nick does too. These alone would save quite a bit of processor time. The routines of Niclas and also those of Chris Jungen are still quite considerably faster.
I feel inspired perhaps I will code some more 3D after all. After all if they say it takes 50 years to get as good as they are then it must be right mustn't it???????
Manikin
16:24
We (Galtan Six ) arrived at 13:30 here in the office. It was quite hard to find. It's already very crowdy here. At this moment a new member of Hotline has arrived. I'll wrap now 'cos
Sammy Joe has some problems again with his "Maggie" GfA source...
CIA
16:30
I have to...
<Fury interrupting: Fuckin' Holland, I've only been there for less than a day and I'm allready sick. Fuck!!!... End of interrupt>
16:58
...what Fury calls sick is the fact that he wants to go to the toilet for a very big production (if you know what I mean...).
Ajrarn of the ST Connexion and Fishbone of the Vegetables are here now and the other freaks will be here in a few minutes. We just came back from a nice restaurant in Oss and a fantastic post-nuclear-hardly-sexy adventure happened to us: We (hjdfhjtitj! - Vegetables' interrupt) got in the place and as we were speaking French, two girls came and started speaking with us...
Then Chris of TGE took off his trousers and savagely raped her on the table while barking like a mad dog, then Alexis and Pulsar caught the second girl and then started to lick her face... Well, I love this country, the girls are going to come back this evening...
Zae
Extremely wondering editor note: Well, you never know what's real and what ain't with those Frenchies (nor with TGE Chris). But this article is not censored at all so it's there for all to loathe and/or admire...
17:30
SILENTS!! I'm a bit tired of all people that say "Sync & Omega are here!" Don't they know that Sweden's coolest crew are here!?
SILENTS!!
Although only represented by one man (there were no more seats in the car)!
Cugel of Silents
17:40
TFE is back, more serious this time.
First, Silents are lamers. They (he) can't make a simple sprite routine without using the STE blitter! He is so stupid that we tried to lose him in Gothenburg yesterday, but he found us at the boat to Denmark. It is a really hard guy to get rid of, so we let him come with us anyway.
Well, some parts of this is actually true, but some of it is just part of my imagination. I could write some really serious stuff about Omega or myself, but that would probably ruin my rumour.
(Rumour?! ED.)
TFE of Omega
17:50
TGE is back, more violent than ever this time. We just raped Stefan and blasted the Headquarter away.
Believe it or not - TEX just arrived, and even more spectacular (Mad) Jochen has got short hair now.
Acco of TGE
17:55
Cugel of Silents is back to write some TRUE stuff!!
Omega are a bit pissed at me becoz I beat the shit out of them in the latest demo competition (Falkøping in Sweden 28-30 September 1990).
Actually Omega begged me to join them to Holland... and I did, just to be nice to them!
Cugel
18:06
Hello guys, here is Crystar of Pendragons typing on this QWERTZUIOP keyboard. It's very hard for me to write on such a keyboard, as I am used to an AZERTY one.
This party is very good for the moment. A lot of very great guys are present here. At the moment, we are coding a screen where it should have 10 sprites 4 planes with a size of 64*62 pixels.
Of course, we are going to use our generator which is at this moment better than the ones M-Coder and OVR have.
Good bye.
Crystar from Pendragons
18:11
Zeqhhh!.. huh... I mean "Yeahhh!" but this Dutch keyboard (German actually, ED) is quite an uneasy thing to deal with...
So, please, forgive all mistakes (spelling ones, at least) I could make in this little text.
So, we, Overlanders, arrived here (in a Dutch school) a few hours ago. We were not alone 'coz the Pendragons, Legacy and Hysteria went along with us...
Too bad, I cannot write anything with this keyboard or I guess it would take hours... I shall see if there's no way that I could write it on a French keyboard and then include it here later...
So, I leave ya here for now... Our next adventures will be told later (by me or by someone else)...
See ya!
Dogue de Mauve from Overlanders
18:21
Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz euh ah yes it's me now typing on this shitty German keyboard...arrrgggg it's horrible.....euh yes my name is F....Fl....my name is Flynn!!!! So I can just say that there is a real electric ambiance here...wwaarrzzzz!
OK, that's all for now...I'll strike back here in two hours to tell you our adventures........... Burp!
Flynn from Hysteria...
18:28
WHAT'S THIS?!
A qwertzuiop keyboard that turns my head out!! Okay, I'll try...
All the people here are very nice, but ... no smoking allowed! What a pity!!
Sorry, but my dear French keyboard is waiting for me ... so ...see ya later !!!
MOPY from The Ghosts Genius of Hysteria Alliance...
QUITE A BIG LEAP IN TIME DUE TO THE REAL-TIME ARTICLE COMPUTER NOT BEING AVAILABLE DUE TO MOVING ACTIVITIES
(The original location of the coding convention was to be a small castle in Oss, but it wasn't available until Friday evening because people still had to work there. So the beginning of the Convention was held in a school, and early in the evening we actually went to the actual, real location)
20:55
The past three hours have been of a slightly hectic kind. It generally involved the unexpected arrival of approximately thirty to fourty people too much (which all wanted to eat), the moving of these people (approximately ninety) to another office of SPC, the eating of food that was meant for fifty people (and the organisation of all the people that did not have to get it at once) and (last but NOT least) the transportation of all computer
gear from the other office to the new one.
We also, for example, discovered that there's someone here that can only eat kosher (of course, the food wasn't).
Stefan is now still in the other office, delegating various little things that have to be delegated.
"That sounds logical enough."
Tanis quote
There weren't enough rooms (the company stated at about four o'clock this afternoon that we couldn't use all the rooms they had previously said we could), there weren't enough chairs and there still aren't enough colour monitors.
There were moments that I sincerely wished that I could flick a switch somewhere and that it would all be over. I think I have a hint at feeling what Stefan feels and I surely feel sorry for him.
Lucky enough, many people here act quite responsibly, although particularly some Aenigmatica guys are acting a bit too Dutch if you ask me.
Now the main hectic stuff is over, various people are walking around taking pictures and shooting videos. Well, this is surely something we've managed to set up, although I am not entirely certain that it's all positive. I think that a sparkle of the tiniest dimensions will cause an explosion here now (not literally, of course).
Tanis wants to get in contact with this Barbara girl and he wants to find out the telephone number of the university she's studying at. I'll go and assist him.
Richard
21:16
I've got black spots all before my eyes. The strain of the recent hours must have gotten the worst of me.
OK. I will allow myself to try to give a short description of the place we're in.
It's an nineteenth-century kind of house with a little tower-like thingie that makes it appear like a castle. It's got two storeys as well as a small attic that we can't use. Basically, this means that we've got two huge rooms, one large room, three smaller rooms and one tiny room.
The two huge rooms as well as one smaller room are downstairs, together with the kitchen and a storage room that will now no doubt contain a lot less than its original 300 litres of Coke. This is absolutely hectic beyond description. I am not just trying to sound funny or convincing here, and it's no means of trying to tell you that there's quite a lot of people around here.
No.
It's abso-fucking-lutely bulging with people in each and every nook and cranny, and it's a blo-fucking-ody noise everywhere. Sometimes I am afraid that the whole office will crash or something, but I guess that's what Coding Coventions are like.
Well... I was describing.
One of the huge rooms downstairs is occupied by Sync who have a powerful audio system at full power constantly, Next, and lots more. The other huge room's got ST Connexion and Aenigmatica (as far as I could see), and the smaller room downstairs is filled by the Overlanders that I am continually liking more and more (they understand everything about the lack of food and stuff like that - swell guys, really!). The Pendragons are in that room as well, and probably Hysteria as well.
Upstairs, there's one big room, two smaller ones and one gino-normo-fucking-lutely-small one. The latter one has The Garlic Eaters and (should they arrive) the Black Monolith Team and the Unlimited Matrices from Luxemburg. That's about fifteen people but I guess that's tough shit. If I could make miracles happen I would, really. We need a bigger office but we ain't got one.
SUCK!
Anyway. The biggest room upstairs is the one I am in now, and it's quite quiet actually. There's The CareBears, The Lost Boys, Rob Povey and The Watchmen (Chris and Ian, cool looking dudes that generally walk around with walkmen on their head and stuff).
The smaller rooms have DF (or TDF, the Delta Force anyway) in one, and TEX, TNT-Crew and Unicorn in the other.
I guess that just about sums up what is going on here. I missed out an enormous amount of smaller crews (especially French independent one-man crews) and stuff (don't feel insulted, Omega and others I forgot!!).
I guess Furyo is going to type something now.
Richard
21:30
Hello everybody, (argh, it's a fuckin German keyboard, and it is really hard to write something right...). Tanis is just beside me, and he is drawing some kind of giga-font for an unknown screen. Downstairs there's a big mess, but here it's quiet, and calm, so that makes you feel cool. We have brought back lotsa STs from France, and monitors as well, so you can imagine how heavy it was... But now, we are having a great time, and it is a nice convention.
The Delta Force are in the other room on the other side of the hall, and they are waiting for the TEX screen by Daryl - then the "Syntax Terror" demo will be ready (wow!).
OK, I have to leave you now, becoz there is lotsa cool people I haven't met yet - so bye!
Furyo
21:55
Perceval (of Zuul) just burped the loudest burp you could ever possibly hear. I drank half a litre of Coke and burped as loud as I could in a braindeafening fashion that was indescribably burpy, and then this dude simply said "You can't beat me and that" and
burped me completely off my socks.
It was a sound only equalled by the sound of a Concorde engine at 2 nanometres distance from one's eardrums.
Wow. This is amazing.
No. This is no longer anything HUMAN for he must be some kind of alien from the planet BURP called BWAARRGH or something.
It's terrible.
So far, I thought I was the loudest burper in the known universe but I obviously am not. I have just pledged a solemn oath.
I WILL NEVER BURP AGAIN UNTIL I CAN BEAT PERCEVAL OF ZUUL!
I will practise only in bathrooms.
Richard
22:04
I've got to tell you that I am human and after this first burp (a little one for me) Richard introduced me to TEX and B-B-B-Bittner, asking me to burp!
What for?
I will never understand!
Why life is so hard?
Why are the Pendragons trying to steal this keyboard away from me instead of coding a fuckin' great demo as they are use to do?
Well, as soon as they're getting up (they are awake for about one month a year) and do a screen for our amazing unbelievably unbeatable demo, I will excuse them for it.
Perceval (The Ultimate Burper)
22:10
Yes!! Now I've got the keyboard and it's really very hard to type something on this German keyboard (yeah, yeah, we've heard this often enough by now, ED.). When I want to type an "a" I get a "q" and for the other letters it is the same problem.
Now that's all because I've got no idea and I must go to annoy the other people here.
OK - bye bye and many kisses to my girlfriends (everywhere).
Silver of the Pendragons of Triton Development
22:19
Some people called MPH just came in, and they're supposed to cover everything for the English magazine "ST Format". They are also the ones publishing the "TCB Tracker" and stuff.
They're four people and they're called Phil, Steven, Robert and (finally) Paul.
"But not least!"
Phil quote
Richard
22:24
It is certain: It is not possible to live on Coke alone - and that's the only thing I had today as I refrained from eating (there wasn't enough, so I just felt kinda noble).
People are brabbling French all around me and for all I know they can be calling me 'asshole' or something.
Ah!
Behold this. This Convention is, to say the least, enormous.
Richard
22:30
Flynn and Psychoreal strike again and again.....
So what can I say.....?
Yes I know: I will speak about some people....
For example about Annnn Khollllll (An Cool, ED.): It's really a crazy man: When I start to type this shitty text I saw this man running, doing some strange songs like: "Wwwaaarrrrrggggggg, hhhuuuuaarggg......"!!!!!!
Really strange, don't you think?
Eheheheh, but I think it's a great guy!!!!!!
So..........I have seen some nice screens from TCB and TLB: Really amazing!!!! OK I stop this and now I must code my unlimited sprite eeuuurrrgggggg!
Oh: what can I see? The BMT crew has arrived two minutes ago....cool...!!!!!!
Flynn and Psychoreal
22:41
Those Frenchies really use lotsa questions marks, exclamation marks and periods, don't they? Seems like they're desecrating some laws of grammar and various other ones. But you can't blame them in this general hectic thing called "THE ST NEWS INTERNATIONAL CHRISTMAS CODING CONVENTION".
Spaz and Genital Grinder are listening to digi songs they made, that solely consist of sounds sampled from a movie called "Bad Taste". This means chainsaw sounds, blood splurting and more like that.
The Watchmen seem to like it very much. But they're bloody English perverts anyway: A hereditary load that was already on their shoulders when they were still an egg and a sperm cell - a long time ago.
What a strange collection of beings here...
Richard
22:45
Mark (the dead one from the Lost Boys) is planning to use Ian from the Watchmen as a stunt double for Toxic in the Alcoholica video cuts.
Tim has also just mistaken Ian for Dave, and asked him (Ian) if he has finished the graphics for the TLB/TCB screen.
Chris of the Watchmen
22:50
I Don't look anything like Toxic or Ian so fuck off.
Spaz...
22:55
I surely wouldn't mind if Stefan would show up now.
Oh my God. Jochen just came in. I've gotta move.
Richard
22:57
Hi people!
This is the ST Connexion lamer talking to you (Vantage). Krazy Rex, our GFX-man, is currently showing parts of his work to Tanis of the Carebears, just beside me.
We arrived at around 6 p.m. this evening, in two cars directly from Paris. We therefore only joined Ajrarn our new coder (or one of our two new coders) tonight, as he came by train with Ze Watsit, our boss from ST Magazine (French version) and above all a cool friend (pouissantesch!).
Belzebub (coder) is presently working on our mini-3.5k-demo downstairs (hopefully... you never know with those lazy coders!). Ajrarn is fixing our Bless Dis Mess Main Menu, and we will hopefully start putting everything together this weekend.
We got some nice talks with various crews here, including Sync, Omega (cool Swedes, and that's a compliment coming from a Dane!), TCB, TEX, TLB (ACC, ED.) etc... OK, see ya some other time!
Klaus (the great 1m95 Dane, shoesize: 49 - Furyo/OVR you have got bloody small feet !!!!!!!!)
23:17
Not long ago, the doorbell was molested by a couple of people from Luxemburg, and this signalled the arrival of the UnLimited Matricks from this strange little land where people speak German, French, and a strange language I forgot the name of.
I think there's two of them, but I may be mistaken. I think I heard somewhere that they are finishing a mega demo here. We'll see.
As far as I know, "Syntax Terror" is nearly finished (except for a screen by Daryl of TEX, as far as I gathered), and the Overlanders are finishing the "European Demos" tomorrow (that's what Mister Bee of OVR told me, anyway).
Richard
23:24
Alcoholica rules. Anyone who thinks otherwise should go and wank!
May everybody suffer in torment! Pus and viscera soaks your hair, mucus is oozing down the stairs! Yeah, Hippy!
Coprophagic Necrocannibal Eviscerator
23:27
Someone in the room on the other side of the hall has had the common decency of bringing a Ghettoblaster with CD, and Living Colour's "Time's Up" is playing there now.
And the Dearest of Master Editors has just arrived back again! I saw his car drive up.
Ooo....I'm being inter-fucking-viewed or something?
Richard
Well the time is now 23:33 and Dick has just said "Dave don't forget the time " as he is getting very pissed off with people not putting the time above their texts. What I was going to say was that I think I have just finished my (Dick has just hassled me again because I just had one fuckin' spelling mastake (what a wanker)) picture for the compitition on Sunday, that means that I can sleep for two days!
Spaz
23:40
What a lazy shit, I hope his boils erupt with such force that the pus leaving his head ruptures the cavites in his skull causing multiple spazms that tear his spinal chord from his body leaving just a useless pile of rectal tissue...
Ode by Dr.Toxic Foetus Eater.
23:44
A lustful necrophiliac, your carcass I explore. Whipped into a frenzy, I fillet suck and groan. Memorize then masterbate bloody soaked and ravaged, I scoop you into bags, a reeking pile of garbage. May you experience an evisceration, laceration and excoriation. Your brain, a wobbly jelly gushes on the tabl, squeeze the intestines the pleasure is immense. Pus sogs your clothes, from brain down to your toes. May the pain be intense. I
handle the scalpel as a woman handles nuts, carefully and beautifully, I remove your nob, I eat your testicles and let you sob!!
Dr. Coprophagic Necrocannibal Eviscerator. M.D.
23:55
CRAP.
Toxic
23:55.30
Sod off, nob end!
Copro!
23:56
No Bloody Way Mate!
Toxic
23:56.24
Can't you at least get me a blood sample?
Copro!
23:56.52345678123456712345678123456789123456789
NO!
Toxic
23:57
But I'm a copro, and copros don't run!
Copro!
23:58
What!
Toxic
5ft.10
Hello. I'm Copro!
Copro!
23:59
Scattered remains, Splattered brains That's Copro........
Toxic
23:59.59
Toxic is a sonic bastard! May his soul rest in vomit!
Copro!
00:00
Yes but you're a musical pervert!!!!
Toxic
00:08
Let's quit this crap guyz.
Richard
22:09
NO!
Toxic
**:something
I agree!
Copro!
00:12
Well, we're back from the girls hunting competition, which was a competition between Sammy Joe, Alexis (ST Wars), An Cool, Mit, Chris, Mr Mac, TFE, Mega, New Mode, Mega Cribb,Slime, Fury, Jas, and me (ZAE).
Results:
Sammy Joe: He vomited the 6 beers he drank but is actually discussing a girl that looks pretty nice indeed...
Alexis: Er....well, perhaps next time ?
An Cool: Was about to be successful but finally ran away (don't ask me why...)!
Mit: Sammy robbed the girl he started to "approach".
Chris: Gave up.
Mr Mac: Actually still with a girl, good luck Tore...
TFE: Too drunk to attempt a successful "approach".
Mega: Should not drink that much.
New Mode: Ran away.
Mega Cribb: ST NEWS is not a porn magazine so I won't describe his behaviour...
Slime: Ran away.
Fury: Ran away.
Jas: Ran away.
ZAE: Two lamp stands switched off and then gave up.
Well, some others were there too but I can't remember who (I promise I just drank Coke!) but the global result is that we'll try to do better next time...
ZAE
00:31
Editor: Mega Cribb.
Supervisor: Flying Egg, Zae and An Cool.
Once upon a time there were a bunch of people (listed above), going to the pub, just to see the life in the town called Oss city (South of Holland (I think!)). With this cool gang there were some guys called the Lost Boys, who claimed that they could drink anyone under the table. So they tried, but they failed. The Swedes stood up, watching the Lost Boys puke at the ground.
Could it by any chance have been caused by the Swedish cheek tobacco called "snus" An Cool offered them? We don't think so.
Directly after this experience we went and wrote this article, so now I guess we have to finish the mission we once started.
Mega Cribb
00:45
I would just like you to note that the only Lost Boy who went down the pub was Sammy Joe, this is because he is so sexually frustrated he has to try and fuck anything on four legs. So remember that story is about Sammy Joe......
Spaz
00:51
So that's what the people are up to if they vanish from the premises for a short while. If I get to see a drunk person I will chuck him out.
Richard
00:55
So I am back.
Actually, I've been back for quite a long time but I didn't get the chance to write anything. I went home to have a shower and sit for a while in total peace and quiet. I am feeling a lot cleaner now, but I still am very tired and have to sleep soon or I will totally and utterly collapse.
Apparently, Michael is out and he is drunk. Now I specifically told NOBODY to get drunk and vomit all over the place so I will NOT allow him access to the building even if he is a fellow Lost Boy.
Poor Tanis sitting next to me is still working on the enormous font that has to be used. It's 256 pixels high and approximately just as wide. Amazing. I can't wait to see it animated by Nick and Fabian.
It's total mayhem around here. Especially downstairs it's a total chaos. Computers and people EVERYWHERE. Tomorrow, my boss will come over to have a look and I hope that after this is all over, I'll still work for SPC/C...
Sunday night we will all have to move to the ITC office again, which will be quite an operation, and then I have to go back and clean up the office since Joost (my boss) is having important people over on Monday. Then Monday evening I will have to clean the ITC office as well. Let's see how many volunteers I can get for it.
I will NEVER EVER EVER again organize a convention of such proportions. I mean it is great fun to meet all these people and to be present at the biggest meeting of ST users ever but it is a bit tiring for the one responsible for the office and all the stuff in it.
Anyway, I will stop complaining now and lighten up a little. Time to read some of the other stuff that has been written by the various nutcases around here.
Stefan
01:30
TEX have just gone to bed and Dick has just told me to tell you how lame they are.
Spaz
01:37
Yeah, and he's now telling that he's going to sleep, too (and that he's getting pretty tired of being called 'Dick' by what must be the most immature being roaming these premises).
Richard
01:42
I am not a Dave-clone!
Ian
01:42
Well I'm not going to bed and I do not look anything like Ian as he is ugly and I am one of the most wonderful and loverbull people in the whole wide world!!!!!!!!!
Spaz
01:45
Fuck that damn'd "NEOchrome Master"! What'a hell have I done?
Chaos, Inc.
02:00
I'm tired and Richard's bloody ST has the Y and Z keys in the wrong place. I have had so little sleep over the last three days I'm not even going to bother counting it. Unfortunately it
doesn't look like I'm going to get to sleep any time in the next three or four hours, Tanis is still drawing character number 4 in his 28 character font (He started it 2 days ago) and he's trying to finish it before Sunday morning when TCB leave. Tim is staring at his demo screen looking fairly pissed off and Nick and Fabian are desperately trying to get the TLB/TCB demo screen working.
There are so many good coders and graphic artists here it's hard to say who's the best so I'm not even going to try (good thing, ED.).
Rob Povey
02:15
Well everything is OK but something has been left: there is no place to sleep, and it is practically impossible because a lot of people (I will not say 'lamers' because there are master coders like Sync) are listening to music or soundtracking with the heaviest volume the machine may accept.... When everybody will be tired tomorrow we will compose music, because it is now 02:20 and I haven't slept in two days....
So I'm gonna sleep - I hope you won't miss me and my boring text..........
Perceval from Zuul
02:24
Hello and good morning. Here is Chris of TGE and The Fate of ULM and of course Gunstick of ULM. We just sit here around in the TLB and TCB room. But I think we will leave here 'coz they are all too lame...
You know, we have to finish our Mega Demo, called "The Dark Side of the Spoon"....
We all like Pang and Bacardi...
Ssssso far, Chris, The Fate and the rest....
02:36
Woaauurrghschtippo! I hate all fonts. I hate all letters. I hate all graphics. I hate all computers. I hate all people. I hate me and my life! I just have to thank Gogo for taking over for a while. Any artist knows that it's not actually little work to do a font that's one and a half screens high. Gogo says that it's all planning, but I think that is a bunch of crap. Now, I'm actually getting a bit tired, so I'll sign off for a few hours!
Tanis
02:46
Well it's getting late now and Robert, Phil, Paul and myself (Steve) are still awaiting the "Kick Off II" competitions. Collectively we are known as MPH Computer Specialists Limited from Norwich, England.
A sleeping space has not yet been finalized for tonight, that is if we even have a place to sleep, or if we sleep at all.....
The last time I slept was about 6am on Friday morning, and you can see the time now from above (02:46).
When I started this message Phil, Robert and Paul where actually helping me with what to write but now they are all crowded around "An Cool".
Hopefully Robert will now type something........
Well I have just been pushed into this seat by Steve, so I presume I have to write somefing?????? It is very very late now, and a lot of people are forcing themselves into playing games, and other obserditys (I know my spelling is bad, but it's late)...
Robert (RX2) n' Steve (Miz)
03:20
Kabang!
An Cool
03:30
As you can see it is now quite early in the morning and so far Michael is not back from his tour of places to vomit in foreign pubs. Most people seem to think he has his dick stuck in some dog's butt, but this may not be true...
...it could be a cat or a chicken!
Toxic
03:24
The twat above got the time wrong. Well I've had enough, it's very late, I'm very tired and I have achieved absolutely nothing all day except to prove that Fabrice's fast line routs are not fast and that I still get beaten by stupid drawing and erasing routines. This pisses me off rather a large amount so with sleeping bag in hand I will now retire!!
Manikin(disch)
03:32
Zzzzzzzzzzzzzz yes, i'm sleeping...... (no comment!)
Flynn the hysteric one......
PS: I have finished my multi-sprite demo wwhhhaaouu! Now I have to put some soundtracker muzaxx in it..........! (No: I don't use the "TCB Tracker" routs..!)
"Glad to hear it!"
Genital Grinder quote
03:35
Yeah here is another hysteric one (member of Hysteria, wouarf!). OK, I'm very happy to be here at this giga coding party - it's funny... (sniff... I can't code the ST because it is used by my graphics person...)
OK, bye I'm gonna code this f.....g screen ?!?
IKI of hysteria
03:40
Breadhead!
Copro!
03:43
Vantage here again. I have just seen the ULM Megademo (90% ready, only a few graphics to fix), and it really knocks you off the chair... I don't think I'm supposed to give any details at the moment (as it probably will be released tomorrow), but you can all look forward to it, to say the least.
Be talkin' to ya some other time...
Vantage
03:56
Delta Force and BMT just threw about half a dozen of chairs out of their room; well, I think they'd like to sleep now! No bad idea...
See ya.
Ford Perfect
04:10
Dengel, dengel, dengel what about the film Werner Beinhart to write? It's not too bad but it isn't very original !!!!!!!!!
OK. Another topic. What about the new "NEOchrome Master" version 2.2? It's really great, nearly all graphics men at this convention work with it, coz there is nothing better:
"Neochrome" is the best, forget all the rest!!
What about a list of graphics men who paint with "Neochrome"? First to be mentioned: Gogo (TCB) at my side working on the big font for their screen, Tanis (also worked on the font), or what about ES of TEX, Scum (BMT) and me (Thor, also BMT). And perhaps, one day, even Spaz will be enlightened...
Enough bullshit. Go on and read other fuckin' texts.
It's really great here.
Thor (BMT)
04:30
Well. That's, sort of, roughly calculated since the clock outside showed 04:25 approximately 5 minutes ago. Spaz (Me) and Tanis (Me) has just been on a foodhunt. Unfortunately the service in this town is really poor. I mean, not one single shop was open. Can you believe that? God! The streets were also very empty of people. I can't actually figure out why. I mean, it's not that the Olympics have begun yet, so there is no point in sitting at home, is there? No. the Dutch people are really strange, I think! Talking about strange people. Is it really wise to sleep in the kitchen, when people would like to get something to eat? Stupid frogs (they referred to Furyo who was sleeping under the kitchen table, ED.). We should eat them, actually!
Have you seen the weird-looking pig in the centre of the centre of Oss? Well. With a bit of imagination, you can get it really kinky. That would be something for Nick's extremely queer dog!
Spanis
Editorial note: The raunchy-o-meter indicated that the following entry is without the shadow of a doubt the dirtiest and most insulting in this entire issue of ST NEWS (indeed, of ALL issues ever made, including the hidden articles!).
So be warned, noble reader!
04:50
Well, I haven't talked to you yet so you better listen up good. There's a new crew in town. Only the meanest, dirtiest, smelliest, most repulsive, revolting, disgusting, hideously deformed rectum impalers in existence are members. The current list of undead members includes : Coprophagic Necrocannibal Eviscerator - Toxic Foetus Eater and last but not cleanest Genital Grinder (Member muncher). The whole world will suffer rectal prolapses as soon as they witness our first combination of incredibly brutal music and eye-melting grafix (well, maybe). Well, apart from being the best coder in the universe, I, Genital Grinder, am the tallest beast this side of Karsmakers' left buttock and have a penis as big as Erik Simon (Yes! All 7 feet!).
A smelly bastard named Dave (Ian?) is standing behind me, what a lamer (lama?) . He looks very much like Spaz of the Lost Boys but nothing like Toxic of Alcoholica! It's funny, because Spaz looks like a Muppet, namely AAAAAAnnnimaaaalllll. So New Model Army are very good, and so is "TCB Tracker" (Ha ha, what a lying cunt!)!!!!!
Oops, bad language. What a fucker, now some Japanese. Nee mai joje Huz Mes des ca (which means Lemmings are sexy little animals with tight bums and big nobs). I'm gonna come, come, come, come all over your face... sorry, just singing. Ian (Dave?) has just run away and returned in case I write something true about him. For instance, he's a really nice guy, he licks asses and fucks lemmings, a great guy!
Aaaaaaaaggghhhhhhh ! Sammy Joe of The Lost Bastards is sitting opposite me, what an ugly bastard! Haaaaa haaaa haaa. He must have auditioned for The Elephant Man. I bet they didn't give him the job because the camera's broke when they filmed him. They could've saved a fortune on make-up! It's sometimes hard to tell if he's sitting down or standing on his head with his trousers down. Chris of the Wankmen is bending over, waiting for me to walk past and fill him with my massive meat missile. He's standing behind S.J. now, it's S.J.'s turn.
That Lemming game on the Amiga is fuckin' amazing. Yes, the scrolling is shit, the graphics are tiny and the music is torture, but it's all worth it when you see the Lemming's guts fly across the screen when you kill him without reason. Unfortunately, there aren't many ways of maiming them except outright explosion. Perhaps the writers could put in some chainsaws and bondage. Imagine the hilarity of fucking a Lemming dressed in black PVC and studs while lascerating his neck with a chainsaw. AAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaaagggggggghhhhhh!
Shit, I've got to change my underpants now. Ian is a cunt (one of a pair).
Yours, shit, blood and cum soaked, Genital Grinder.
(By the way, I'm not sure about Torsten Mucha's sexuality Or how to spell his name, so keep your trousers done up and your pencils(??) ready! )
05:35
Has anyone ever heard of a totally not bad bunch of guys called The Watchmen? If so, you probably know that it has four people. Two of which (Zogg and The Skunk) are complete wankers who deserve to rot very nastily in a place equally horrid (a place not totally dissimilar to the inner, upper walls of my rectum - after a lemon curry!)
Basically Zogg+The Skunk, if you are reading this "You are fucking cunts who, if I had my way, would never have been born fully limbed! Ha! So never ask me to draw some poxy logo that you probably won't even pay me 500 quid for anyway!"
CUNT!
Ian (the one in The Watchmen who fucks lemmings)
05:43
It's getting bloody late now, and all the guys downstairs are dropping like the proverbial insects. I am getting steadily more pissed off with the shit demoscreens that I am attempting to code. Sitting next to me is Gogo, who is talking to Tanis about this crazy 50 screen high font which Nic and The Hammer are going to use in some freak-of-shit sync scroll screen. The Genital Grinder is trying to get Coprophagic Necrocannibal Eviscerator from the sick and whacky Alcoholica to give him this stupid font, and now that he has refused, they are slagging each other off in a big way
Chris
06:25
Right, still no sleep and the fucking shops aren't open yet. Holland sucks. All Dutch are lazy bastards, why don't they work all night AND day?? I'm HHHHUUUUUUNNNNNGGGGRRRRYYYYY. Spaz is just playing a CD of ATROCITY, and is pointing out that about 16 out of 22 tracks on the aforementioned severe grindcore album all start with four tapping drumsticks. Wow! Variation man. An Cool listens to 2 Live Crew. Ha! What a winkel. Let's exploit women for our own monetary gains! Yeah! Alcoholica are all for it! If there are any women out there that would like to sleep with the collective members(!) of Alcoholica, please contact us. And - please, only the rarest venereal diseases. We welcome AIDS and other terminal diseases, but please ... no Ghost viruses!
Carcass is playing on the CD player now, and I think it's quite hard for everyone else to sleep around us. We fart a lot!
Tanis still has a pot of shit next to this keyboard (some commercial chocolate mousse dessert, actually, ED.), it's been open for hours, hopefully it will be contaminated with AIDS and he will die before he returns to Sweden. That way I can smuggle his decaying corpse into England for my own pleasures. Uh!
Gijnetaijl Gryijndaar
06:40
The shops will be open in about 2 hours, so we can go and buy some food. We could just steal some from TCB...
Vomited Anal Tract (Alcoholica)
06:42.34
The Watchmen are so sad that when they die their mutilated corpses would not even be used for dog food.
Toxic Foetus Eater (grilled babies and fried dicks)
06:58
The sun is not out and the sky is not blue and it's raining shit!!!!!!!
Spaz
I can't believe that Tanis has fallen asleep. What a bloody poof! I even managed to put the bucket of chocolate shit on his head and take a photo while he was asleep! I think that unless he seriously rapes and pillages some local Dutch villages, we'll have to throw him out of Alcoholica. And I MEAN rape, including all animals, especially the statue of the pig in Oss. Not surprisingly, Ian of The Watchbastards is also 'making like a tramp' and sleeping against the wall. All this while are making 'like Lemmings with cemtex up their asses'. Spermbirds are the best band in the world, .... at 07:05.
Genital Grinder
07:13
Tanis just woke up and looked at us. He then started to sleep again. THEN he got up and collapsed on the floor. BLOODY POOF.
Genitalia Grindus
07:16
Grindy Gens is presently trying to get a Lemming to put on a Burger King Hat and succumb to his strange sexual advances. He has just got into his sleeping bag so that he can play with his prick without the rest of us knowing!
Vomited Anal Tract
07:28
Hah! The couple of lamers! The two you've just been reading have crashed out under the table. Got pissed on Coke probably. Anyway there is only four of us left awake now, tell a lie five no six of us still going strong at this time in the morning. Vomited Anal Tract has just told me from under the table not to write that he is getting sleepy and he hasn't got smelly feet. So now you know. And would you know it Tanis is back with the living.
One of the Watchmen
07:43
They're out again. Back down to us four. Three graphix men and me. Phil, Tanis, Vomited Anal Tract and Grindy Gens all sleeping like bloody poofs. Outside you hear the odd car or bike and see the odd person wondering around. This is the worst part of the night. It's fucking boring!!!!!
Paul (Zeus of Teknique)
08:00
ZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz!
(Everyone)
08:16
It is like this place has been gassed with poisonous gas. There are bodies everywhere, its really hard to go from one place to another without stepping on someone.
As we are too bored this quiet morning to write anything more, we'll stop here.
TFE and HAQ of Omega
08:22
REGUS BCT
TFE and HAQ of Omega
08:30
I am TLS and I'm pissed out of my brain coz I slept on the floor for two bloody hours. The other freaks are still sleeping, like Sammy Joe, he's sleeping on the floor until I will get him awake. Now the man with the smelly feet (Fury) enters the room.
End of message.....
TLS
08:37
HUOALLAO There... Sorry if I'm so utterly sleepy - it's just that I haven't slept for more than 7 hours in the past 2 days, and, worst of all, I haven't even been able to code anything in this same time. That's fuckin' bad!
There's one thing I must explain now as I can see everyone around here is slagging me off for my smelly feet. Well guys, you're a bit late as I'm not wearing any of my 'smell creator' shoes, so you won't smell my feet like at Thalion last summer.
By the way, if I read a message afterwards about my smelly feet, I`M GONNA BE REALLY BAD, I'M GONNA PUT MY SMELL CREATION SHOES ON FOR A WHOLE DAY, AND FINALLY I'M GONNA PUT THE SOCKS CREATED BY THIS TECHNIQUE UNDER THE NOSE OF THE AUTHOR...
Beware of Fury's wrath dudes... Over...
Fury
09:10
I was one of the first to feel sleep and I asked 5 people (Aenigmatica and others ) to get up me at seven.
At 9 I got up by myself - they were all asleep.
Well when we arrived yesterday I have been told that this morning was the last limit for the release of the "European Demo" and "Syntax Terror", but Overlanders have slept for all night long too and I can't find Delta Force......
Perceval from Zuul from The Pact from a-whole-lot-of-things-more
09:25
Yo! And good morning!
It's me again, and I have to say that I have slept very well indeed - which is rather a bit of a miracle as I slept in the same room as ES (who snores), 6719, Ilja of Level 16, Unicorn
(who wears funny blue silk pyjamas), TNT-Crew (who farts) and Oxygene (who snores VERY loudly).
There is an entirely different atmosphere here now. There's basically two groups of people now: The ones who have slept and the ones who haven't, and the latter are a slight minority.
I think I'm going to head for somewhere where I can wash my poor being, so that I can get awake a bit more...
Richard
09:35
Whhhhhaaaaoouuuuu Richard: I haven't slept this night!
I coded all the time! (censored!)
Flynn from Hysteria
09:38
Zlopbt, I didn't sleep either, but I was too lazy to code anything so I was bored so much that I'm very tired (??).
Blurbb!!!!!
Iki from Hysteria
09:39
He has risen and once more roams the party. Well I slept very well and as I am a selfish bastard I don't really give a flying fuck how anyone else has slept. We have found a really
comfortable little room on the ground floor with space for 3 people and those 3 are Stefan Posterior, Mat from Dynamic Duo and me. Its really comfy and very quiet. The rest of this bunch TCB\TLB all slept variously on the floor, under or on tables and chairs. Tough shit dudes.
Manikin
09:51
"I am proud of you, son," Stefan said and gently patted Ian "Dave Clone" the Watchman on the shoulder.
Then he discovered that Dave (who is his son as you may have gathered from everything) was sitting on the other side of the table.
With an embarrassed look, he shut up and went somewhere else. OK. It is now breakfast time, which means that the ST NEWS editorial staff will head down town (give head to town?) and find a bakery.
Richard
09:54
Well, the first blunder of the day has been made. I woke up, talked to Tim and Mat a little and put on my clothes. Then I made a round through the office, checking the various rooms. People are awake all over the place, generally looking sortof tired and haggard, I guess some of them haven't slept at all. The office is still in a state of holocaust, but it will have to do. It is actually quite nice. I just had a go at "Lemmings", and I must say it is amazingly original. There are rumours that certain people want to convert it to the ST today or something...
Stefan
10:40
I have arrived back from town, where Stefan, Tanis and me got some bread and salad, as well as a bit to drink, and a bit to put on the bread.
Stefan and I have just decided unanimously that we will go swimming at 1300 hours. This should be fun. I hope lotsa people are coming there (all of 'em perhaps?).
This should be fun (yeah yeah).
Richard
10:57
It's a bit rainy outside. We've just arrived. It took us about ten minutes to find this ominous place, but finally I've seen Manikin of the Lost Boys and a fragment of the main menu of the party-demo Tim was programming (or actually debugging.) Right now I'm sitting next to Stefan Posthuma (yeah!). He is showing TS some new and fantastic graphics. Real neat. He is showing some pictures with an enormous speed.
Lucifer
11:03
At last!! I'm here!! After a huge trip from Heerhugowaard to Oss, we have finally arrived at the STNICCC. The building in which it is held is really loaded! I mean there are computers and people everywhere and the atmosphere is quite...well...magical....
Roland
11:23
Well. I really don't know what I am supposed to write now, so I shan't.
Oh yeah, I know something.
I went to bed reasonably in time, but I didn't get to really attempt at sleeping until half past two, when Jochen and Michael B..B..B..Bittner stopped farting and talking about various things you can do with your anal muscle.
Shitty kids' stuff, actually.
"I don't want Neochrome. Neochrome is crap!"
Dave (Spaz) quote
Richard
11:24
In order to find out which of the 2 graphics artists is least shit (Tanis or Spaz) I (Manikin) have now set them a small competition. To draw me a small 7*8 one plane font for use in
the copy party main menu. Whoever loses gets their name as a failure written in large letters all over the screen describing how utterly shit they are!
Manikin
11:36
As far as I understood, about six additional people came in the office during the last half hour. Four of them I didn't recognise (nor do I know where the hell they went to), but the other two seem to be reporters of some kind, of German TOS magazine (Martin Backschat and someone else whose name slipped my mind).
They brought with them some nice prices for the various competitions that are going on here. Let's hope there'll be enough entries, for I guess we have about 30 prizes or something (probably more).
I am afraid that there is no reason to believe (so far) that there'll be more than five or six 3.5 Kb competition entries, a handful of graphics entries and another handful (or maybe less) of 'real' demos.
Richard
11:51
An Cool has been playing hip-hop music on his ghettoblaster ever since he arrived yesterday. I am amazed by the fact that this music does not seem to have ceased during the entire night - and it is now still continuing and creating a crap atmosphere for the heavy-fucking-metal-minded people here in this room (which are actually MOST).
Richard
11:52
Yeah there is now a TT here courtesy of Martin Backschat author of F-Copy 3.0. B-b-b-b-b-b-b-Bittner just ran his 3D game ("Trex Warrior" it will be called eventually, to be released by Thalion somewhere in 1991, ED.) on the TT and it was so fucking fast. He also ran his Fractal generator on it and this was pretty nice too, now he must just make a 256 color version!!!!
Manikin
11:58
I'm just writing some shit down right here cause I don't have anything else to do. I've just watched Spaz drawing a real shitty font of 7*8 pixels, it still looks nice though. I'll see you later.
Roland alias TS
12:05
Well I have got up this morning, even though I'm still rather tired.. I have just seen Tanis finishing a font, and last night I think he was on the verge of dying. Anyway I have things to do, and I can't spend much of time on thiz keyboard, so bye for the time being.............
Robert Alias RX2
12:16
A lot of demo music I find really shit!!
Roland
12:20
I have noticed something. Chips that are dipped in both peanut butter and ketchup aren't really tasty actually. Peanut butter is OK, but the mixture isn't a success. I also advise you not to sleep with your lenses on in a sultry room. You will then notice that you actually live in a very misty world. It also hurts and itches a bit the morning after. It is also not very nice to be woken up by a yelling Manikin saying: TANIS! IT'S BLOODY TIME TO BLOODY WELL GET BLOODY UP! SO DO IT! SHIT FOR BRAINS. It was a very useful experience though. I mean, not all people get a chance to be deaf for a few minutes in the morning after a 2 hour sleep, do they? Thank you for the comfortable headache, Timster! Ying tong iddle i po. ST Connexion is at the moment dragging away the Lost Brains for some interview. We are next. Bummer! May all Swedish computer magazines burn in peanut butter.
Robert 'pervy' (Quartet) looks very weird. He's probably had a tough night. I think it'd be a rather nice idea for him to wash his hair every other year, or so. Povey, povey, povey, povey. Let's think of a good word that rhymes with povey... gotit: Nob. Brilliant! And what rhymes with nob?... Trotsky!
Amazing... (Should be pronounced: Aaaamaaaayyyyzzing). No, I guess I am a poet by nature. Now I have to quit for some weird reason.
Tanis
12:46
I rather disagree with what Richard has written a few hours ago, Hip Hop isn't shit at all!! It sounds great when you're drawing... Oops, some weird fellow (that was me, actually, ED. Richard) just rushed into the room telling us that who ever wants to swim should assemble downstairs on the parking lot, well, I don't feel like swimming at all so I won't go. It was a great pleasure talking to you.
Roland
13:06
I've just been to the first floor and I've seen a pink computer with a screen of about six by six inches (the system of the Dynamic Duo from England). The craziest things happen here... On a screen directly next to me, the new Delta Force demo runs: "Syntax Terror". It's just amazing. As soon as you spot it, copy it! Or I'll come to stick it in your .ss. It has got 21 screens including the reset screen. Now the reset screen is running. Lotsa colors and lotsa moving scrollines. Wow. And of course fantastic marvellous and all the other things musexx. I'll quit now to get a copy myself.
Bye!
Martijn (Lucifer)
13:22
May all lamers' genitals wither and die!!!
Roland
13:35
Right now I am listening to the 'Give it a try' CD by Hippel himself. The 'Bittner Rap' is really funny. Just now, Marc Rosocha, Klaus Peter Plog and Christian "No Second prize" Jungen dropped in with a box full of CD's and Thalion T-shirts and so on. Great.
Stefan
13:64
Just back for a little thingy I have to say. Right now An Cool is having a look in the protection of the Delta Force demo. Maybe he'll crack it. When he feels like it. Next to me Steve is playing a game of the Delta Force demo (yeah, it's got games in it as well, ED.). It's called "Soko Ban". Simple, but very addictive. In the high score, the name 'f.cking easy level' appears. Wonder who that could be. Get the "Syntax Terror" demo in order to play this nice little game. OK, I'll be back!
Martijn (Lucifer)
13:53
I'm bored to death, everybody is coding or else they're checking out the new Delta Force demo. Isn't there anyone civilized around here who is a graphic artist like me? I'm beginning to be desperate, I might commit suicide later on.... S.O.D rules.....(I think, hope, wish)
Roland
14:11
Next to me TS (Roland) is copying the first two issues of the magazine of the Lost Boys: "Maggie". An is doing nothing (as usual). Actually he's checking out some modules from his "TCB Soundtracker". And I'm waiting for the Hippel CD to come to me in a discman. Andreas (Jas) has it now. If he doesn't hurry, I'll come and get it myself, so watch out, Andreas!
On my knee is a small portable CD player playing the CD of Jochen Hippel and Michael Bittner (?!, ED.). Real cool. Yeah!
Martijn (Lucifer)
14:39 and 45 seconds
Hello it's Steve from MPH here again with another short extract from my brain. This time the subject is Women. There are approx. 100 men / Swedish boys here and until about 30 seconds ago there has been no sight of any women!! Since then Paul from MPH has been excited twice - Once by a 35ish year old Dutch woman, and again with a 3 year old. I will probably get shot for this as Paul is now looking over my shoulder (correction strangled).
Ahhhhhhh, still alive..... He said I could leave the message there as long as he can return the favour later on... So watch this space for the revenge...
Merry Christmas to all and may you all have a prosperous new year!!
Steve (Miz of MPH)
15:05
Hi there....
We're actually listening to Mad Max's songs played on a CD player...Of course, all musix are really great...
One thing is important: I hate to write bullshit so I just decide to stop right now.
(Very good, ED.)
Marlon of ST Connexion
15:20
Joost (my Boss) just roamed around the office for a while and he told me he was 'amused' by all of the happenings in his office.
So I think it will be all right. Well, gottago.
Stefan
15:35
Around me, Spaz is looking at "Syntax Terror" and An Cool is listening to the Hippel CD. I have just returned from the swimming pool, followed by a short visit to the supermarket where I met Tanis who was still on the lookout for this Barbara girl that he met in the train (he mysteriously spotted her again).
I was killed several times by ES of TEX in the swimming pool - each time when I wanted to kill him. I feel tired, fatigued and totally exhausted.
I happen to have seen that Marc of Gigabyte Crew, Klaus-Peter (also of this Crew) and Chris of TNT (not TNT-Crew) have arrived. They are looking around a bit, but will leave later tonight as far as I've been able to gather.
I think I'll quit writing for now.
But I will return!
Richard
15:45
I just had a look at what has been written above and I was slightly astounded by the fact that virtually (ABSO-FUCKING-LUTELY) nobody has taken the trouble to tell something about the things that happened at the swimming pool.
So I will now, because various people like Fabien of STCNX, Douge de Mauve of OVR and ES of TEX were TOO FUCKING LAZY to do so!
Well, first everything was really hectic for it turned out to be the best to have a group card once we got to the swimming pool (which we found only after some extensive examination of the Oss infra structure). Lotsa paying to me, me buying a card, and that's it.
From all the people that entered the swimming pool (37 in total), I would like to mention the people that I now still remember. Of course all of TEX, TNT-Crew and Level 16 came along (the hardcore swimming freaks). Also, there were ZAE (who forgot his fucking swimming trunks so we had to rent some), ST Connexion (bits of 'em), Martin and what's-his-name from TOS magazine, TLB, Rob Povey, Tanis of TCB, some Overlanders and all of TDF (THE delta force).
Then we were in. I first made some pictures during the first quarter of an hour (especially in the speed-slide and one of ES' famous 'bombs'). Then I hit the water as well.
The slide is really amazingly fast (if you want to, and if you're not called Tanis). There were also waves and there were girls and it was warm and there was fun and we drowned Jochen and we had even more fun and Stefan wasn't there and neither was Saddam Hussein and....I think I'm getting carried away a bit here.
Please excuse me. I will stop for now (again).
I will go down and kick a couple of French asses to make sure that more people start to write here!
Richard
14:55
Well I'm afraid to say I have just bought a copy of Jochen's CD which I think is very good even though I prefer music like Carcass, Napalm Death, Slayer, Obituary, Cannibal Corpse, Mucky Pup, Gwar and all the other heavy shit like that.
Spaz
16:15
I've just noticed that it's crawling with froggies downstairs, what are they doing here? I hate them, well, not really them, but especially their language and the bread they usually eat.
Roland
16:35
Stefan is getting me the source code of the "Nano Demo" (the ST NEWS Volume 5 Issue 2 demo, ED.) as soon as he finds his harddisk. Let's check that out!
Martijn
16:46
I need a piss.
Roland
17:03
Two things have happened recently.
First, I went to the loo to have a major shit and someone turned off the light (of which the switch was conveniently located outside the loo).
Second, I filmed Alcoholica who are rumoured to keep Fury of Legacy hostage. It was really funny, and contained lotsa ketchup.
You'll have to get the vid' to see the result.
Richard
17:06
Fury interrupting: Actually, Ketchup is definitely toxic for your health (I've got a face as red as a tomato...).
Fury
17:08
Editorial note: This was actually written earlier on a French system by one of the OVR members, and it was merged just now. He even wrote it in several sessions, so the time is somewhat screwed up as well.
"16:17
Yo, boys!
Here I go again, Dogue de Mauve from the Overlanders.
Well, Richard nearly begged me to write something for this big article (I must admit that I promised I would...).
By the way, I'm typing dis on a French keyboard 'coz I can't get used with this f....g Dutch one (it's German, actually, ED).
So, I'll include this text later...
Well, what am I supposed to talk about?
Our journey to get there? This was quite quiet, even if the Pendragons arrived 2 minutes before the train left (we had to RUN, like we had never run before). As for Ziggy Stardust & Mister Bee, they didn't arrive at all! We were worried and wondered how they could manage to follow us... But, after a few minutes in the train, we saw them - hunched under their luggage - walking in the corridor. Pfuuu... they entered the train just when it left.
So, now, here we are. Of course, the "European Demos" aren't yet finished (they're "nearly finished" for ten hours now!), even if we spent the third last nights in front of our computers. Mr Bee, Adso and Ziggy did a great job on it (helped by various guys, such as M-Coder - here's your name, pal! - or Gudul). I want to thank all the people that worked very hard to give us the opportunity of spreading it here.
We also saw the "Syntax Terror" demo (very nice!) and a few previews (screens by ST Connexion - "Bless dis Mess" demo -, ULM and other guys). All people here are very cool and I was very pleased to meet guys such as Sammy Joe, Manikin, ES, Mad Max, Stefan Posthuma, Gogo, Michael "Find'ich Gut" Bittner, Sprog, Spaz, Oxygene, Galtan 6, CPT Headcrash, Slime, Chaos inc., New Mode, Dynamic Duo, Aenigmatica and all the others I forget (too bad). And, of course, I was REALLY pleased to meet all people I already knew (the megamighty CareBears, Richard Karsmakers, Omega, Sync and lotsa others). This is a GREAT coding party, the BEST I've ever been so far (even if we're too numerous, which probably gives nightmares to Stefan Posthuma, the famous organizer of this party).
Remember, "Flattery is my policy"...
I guess I could write lotsa stuff but it would probably be crap.
We went to the swimming pool, this afternoon. It was quite funny (we're something like twenty guys) but we didn't stay long 'coz Ludug hurt his arm and I had a stomach ache (so, as I'm a bad swimmer, I didn't want to stay much in water as my feet didn't reach the ground).
Then, Humungus, Ludug and me began to look for a food-shop. We were wandering in the streets and began to despair. And then we finally decided to ask someone (preferably a pretty young person). But we realized we were just in front of the supermarket we wanted to find! We bought lotsa stuff there and we'll eat it in a few minutes (the others will have to starve alone!) - Sorry, Richard, I didn't mean there's not enough food there but... - I heard that Richard, Fury and Sprog are now setting a bloody act for the Convention video-tape and I'll probably go upstairs and have a look at dis (and take a few pictures, probably, since I bought a new film for my camera).
So, I'll leave you now... But, trust me, I'll came back sooner than you could expect me to... Have a nice death!!!
Doguy"
(End of OVL insertion)
17:13
"Burp."
Richard quote
"Schwein."
Klaus-Peter quote
Yeah
17:20
I think I am going downstairs to supervise the arrival of any food (should this occur).
Richard
17:21
Hey! I've discovered this computer, and it seems that the article is going to be written here! This means that I will be behind this computer for a disproportional amount of time. Ah, you wonder, why is that then? Well let me explain. Or better yet: Let me tell you my name: I am (distant drums sound an eerie welcome...) The Nutty Snake from Aenigmatica (a scream sounds in the distance...). I am afraid that now the location of this computer is known to me, the size of this document is in danger of becoming very large indeed!
Oh, no! The guy on the computer next to me just started the new Delta Force demo again! This must be the millionth time I've seen/heard it. Well, what can I tell you about? I've just arrived 3 hours ago, and already I'm intoxicated with the atmosphere around here. That means that the size of my writing will grow with the minute. The only thing that can make me stop now is the arrival of the food (goulash, I believe). Ah well, I still have to pay for my entry here, so I think that I'll go find Richard some time later (but before the food comes.).
I just saw Chris from The Garlic Eaters poke his head in here, but he didn't see me. This will be rectified in just under 5 minutes (I hope). The guy next to me just started with the "Soko Ban" game from the Delta Force Demo. He began with level 6! We're cracking our skulls now over the problem. Ah! we found the solution: Skip it and go to level 7....
By the way, did I tell you about my latest project? No? Heh, Heh, now I can fill another 4 K with the explanation of it. First two facts: My favourite writer: Douglas Adams. His best book: The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy. I'm trying to duplicate one particular element from the four-book trilogy: The Guide...... Interruption: I've just been told by the Delta Force that there is a reward out for the first person who cracks/hacks the "Syntax Terror" Demo...
Now, where was I? Ah yes. The Guide. There will be an Atari ST version of the guide out soon (if I have my way). There will be a text-file circulating with the guidelines to make an entry. Anybody interested can ask me for the file.
Now joining me are two members of AEnigmatica. Maybe they'll introduce themselves? I'm off to get my version of "Maggie" issue 3. See you soon.
TNS
18:08
Note to TNS: I am very interested in your file (I hope you read this for I will probably forget asking you 'coz there's been literally a thousand things that I have been asked to remember during this day).
I have never seen the "Syntax Terror" demo so far, probably because I am slightly busy. I know this sounds silly, but I just am and I can't do anything about it.
I've just checked out the bit of video we did on the rumoured Alcoholica kidnapping of The Man With The Smelliest Feet This Side Of The Western Spiral Ring Of The Galaxy (in short: Fury).
It's fiendishly funny and all on its own is the main reason to get your hands on the Convention video!
Richard
18:19
This guy called Spaz is sitting right next to me looking as if he could use some sleep and there is this other guy whose name I don't know sitting or actually lying on top of his computer looking quite dead (I just heard from Spaz that he's called Coprophagic Necrocannibal Eviscerator).
Roland the mighty one
18:27
May the force be with you, for the Nutty One (The only TRUE NUTTY ONE is called Ronny! ED.) is here again! Yes TNS is occupying the keyboard again! Right beside me Tanis (or that is who I THINK he is) is sleeping on his keyboard. A few moments ago he slept blissfully with "NeoChrome" on the screen, leaning on the ESC-key, while producing some nice sleep-induced animation. But, as they say: Always let sleeping Tanisses lie, or don't mess with his mouse (no, the grey plastic one!). A friendly passer-by wanted to help the poor snoring guy, and moved the mouse. BANG! His dreams were crudely interrupted, and now he has nightmares while three bombs stand ominously on his screen. But dinner time calls, and even the dead/sleeping must eat. And the Snakes too, so byedebye!!
TNS
18:38
Richard told me to write some bullshit here and so I have to do it right now.
He told me I should write some words about the "Syntax Terror" Demo. My opinion about this demo is: BAAAAAAHHHH.
That's all, I have to leave for some food and for continuing work on the 3.5 KB competition.
New Mode of DF (and NOT TDF)
18:59
What bullshit I have read on this computer so far today! But, I'm afraid you still have a lot to learn about writing quality bullshit!! To find out what I mean, just read my article in "ST Format" when I try to make out that An Cool isn't a lamer. You will then find out just how difficult it is to make a complete and utter load of bullshit sound credible. You never know, some prat might almost believe that An Cool is a good programmer, but thankfully, we all know that isn't true.
More crap from me later.
Phil from the megamighty (?) MPH
19:05
So everybody waits for the new ULM Megademo ("The Dark Side of the Spoon"). For the moment the ICE packer refuses to pack the mod-files! But I hope we will succeed to release the demo tomorrow. So see you later...
Gunstick from Unlimited Matricks
19:10
Well well, I'm pretty sure no one around here knows of the mega important event that'll take place in exactly 4 Hours and 50 minutes, I'll be 19!!! Great!!!
OK, I'll go back coding my 3.5Kb Twintris, and now, you won't be able to say you weren't warned...
Bye for now from Fury (God, did you know Ketchup was bad for your skin?)
19:32
I just reformatted (and kinda spellchecked) quite a load of the stuff up here, but I really wanted to say something.
We have a fair estimate of the amount of people that are here. The people of the catering service told me they had served 104 meals. If you add to this the fact that about five people didn't eat at all (or something), this adds up to (almost) 110.
So I guess that's for now the OFFICIAL WORLD RECORD OF THE ABSOLUTE AMOUNT OF INTELLIGENT COMPUTER FREAKS IN ONE CASTLE IN HOLLAND IN OSS.
No shit (well, maybe just a bit).
That rhymes.
Shall I do a poem?
"NNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!"
(Deafening everybody quote)
Well OK.
Richard
19:50
EVEN DEEPER SIGH.
So the food has been served and everybody has been fed. So that means that everything is OK. Tim just retreated downstairs, I think he is utterly exhausted after hours and hours of coding. Well, I think that the convention is going extremely well, and being the organizer...
"Scheefgenaaide gratenkut (BUUUURRPPP...)."
TS quote
...of this all, I cannot be anything else than happy. The atmosphere here is very relaxed yet very electric as everybody is working very hard on whatever they are creating. Except Tim, who collapsed into a comatose condition some time ago.
Hold on, Marc Rosocha wants to talk shop with the poor dude, so I'd better go and fetch him. BYE!
Stefan
19:58
I can imagine that Tim won't really mind being woken up for what will no doubt be a business proposition of epic proportions (knowing Marc).
I wish I could wake up to the sound of money talking...
Oops. It's Thalion merchandise selling time now!
Richard
20:00
May I inform the editor that I am the nutty one and the abovementioned person called Ronny is The Nutty One. I agree that I am not of the ultimate nutty race, but I am as nutty as Dutchmen go. Maybe my Mexican title complies more to the current standards: El Serpento Loco! or my Italian one: Mario the Maffiozo.. Mario Quote: 'Eh! I Kille people for monee.... You isse my friend!!! I kille you for noozzingk!!'
Last week we had a meeting with a few Aenigmatica members, and decided to form a new group, called.... Aenigmatica!!! Yes! There were many changes! The most important change was: No Zanac! We threw him out (if you're reading this, Zanac: You're out of AEnigmatica)!!
Big news! I just learned that Lucifer has in his possession 6 tapes of 60 minutes each with the complete radio plays of 'The Hitchhikers guide to the galaxy' on them.... There will be furious copying in about 2 hours I think...
TNS
20:22
I just found out that there were even a couple of people more that didn't eat. They were discussing some kind of business deal with Eurosoft or something, and as they did this in the attic (which is OFF LIMIT TERRITORY) they got left out.
"I am not really in full flow - coding-wise, speaking-wise..."
Manikin quote
"Prütüknüpüflüppümütenüke."
An Cool quote (as far as I got it)
Richard
20:25
Dghduhgdfgdzuguzgzugzugd Hi I'm back, I have recovered to some degree although I still feel like shit warmed up to a temperature of 98.4 degrees Fahrenheit. Well Marc did at least wake me for something worthwhile, so it's possible that I will after all write a new game next summer. He kind of makes it sound easy to me which, considering that two weeks ago I would of killed anyone who came near me with ideas for things I could add to "A Prehistoric Tale" this was quite an achievement.
I feel shit. Bye.
Manikin
20:34
Some of the guys of Aenigmatica and Sammy Joe are thinking about going out to Nijmegen (German: Nimwegen, English: Kutstad, Swedish: Knäckedörp) or something. Yesterday, by the intergalactic bypass, Sammy Joe did vomit but this was not due to drinking problems or something like that. I think it was something wrong that he had eaten (semen?).
I am again beginning to write crap and I sense that there's people around that have a lot more inspiration than me.
Richard
20:39
The Overlanders are now using An Cool's machine to test their "European Demos". It is an STE and one of the title thingies does not work correctly. They are now consulting the immaculate Manikin for some information on something technical about which of course I don't know shit for (as I have said before) my mind is but a shrivelled walnut when compared with their unimaginable intellect (I have been known to say this before, so I shan't any more).
Richard
20:43
'After a while it develops along these lines....'
Tape I am just listening at quote.
I am currently listening to the last tape in the series of 6 containing the complete Hitchhikers Guide series. Enjoying is a mere euphemism to the thing I am currently doing. Drat!!! My batteries just went dead!!! F*ck those damn NiCad cells. Burn the lithium power generators, get me a Solar Walkman! Now!
Ah well, as long as I have to do with my small battery-powered thingy, I'll have to keep buying those little bastards.
I think I feel inspiration coming up for a crap-story!!!
"Once upon a time, a long, long distance away, two active bottles started a new enterprise: Clean-a-jeans. Their purpose was to wash all blue, black, grey red and yellow jeans for all surrounding villages. The first bottle, called Phred, would do the actual washing, while the second bottle, called Fredt, would do al the boring stuff like public-relations, management, bookkeeping, advertisements and so on and so on.
Now Phred had one little problem: Because bottles have only one ... eh, leg? Yes, leg! OK. They have only one leg, so the washing machines, which are designed for two legs of course, could not cope with the brunt of all those one-legged pants.
Now Fredt, who was also a very brilliant electronics designer, made a gadget that told the washing-machines to only turn at half the RPM of a normal machine.
Brill! Phred shouted! But, as he was raving about, he chanced to look out of the window, and look at the river flowing next to their cottage."
"1 + 1 = 2!!"
TS quote
Suddenly a boat came drifing by. In the boat were two Belgians. The one Belgian said to the other one: Can I sit in the Middle?
TNS
21:35
Right now the most hardcore, death metal and goriest metal is raping our eardrums, the music is from Marc (Grindy Gens), I think.
Richard is trying to photograph Marc while he is banging his head but Marc stops banging everytime Richard tries to photograph him.
This is really driving him mad and he starts to shout like a psychotic maniac.
Roland
21:40
And I succeeded, and even did a video tape thingie with him being generally insane on it.
I just feel like typing a bit, and a bit fast. But I don't know whattefuck to write about so I guess I'd better stop then.
"Did you know that a whole Coke bottle can fit into your pocket?"
TNS quote
Richard
21:43
Things are very quiet right now. They had just turned off the music (that's one name for it) and all is very silent and peaceful again. Wow! Some guys (among them An Cool and Manikin) have gone to a pub or something. Richard has just told us how to reach the second and third hidden article in the first hidden article. It's easy. The second one I had found myself already. Now for the people who haven't found all three I'll give some hints: To find the first hidden article: When you don't know what to do anymore, just cancel it!
To find the third hidden article: Look very carefully to something that doesn't belong there! And I hope your eyes are excellent because you'll need it.
OK, that was it then. Bye again (Yeah!)!
Martijn (Lucifer)
21:54
Argl... Did you know that sitting down with a Coke bottle in your trouser-pocket is Hell!? Well finally I manage to alight my ass onto the chair, and I get thirsty again!!! So, out with the bottle and drink.... Why isn't there a slosh of Plantiac in it? Okay, I just noticed that there are some function-keyz with which I can do some nice things. See if you can spot them in the rest of the text.
Currently there are two pieces of music playing simultaneously: One can be identified as Betty Boo's doing the Boo. Which now transforms into Snap, and further on into some more crap.
Ah!! the Resettables (a.k.a. the Respectables) have just arrived (big deal!).
About two swigs more of my bottle and it's empty...
"Arrghghhggllllehahahah!"
Spaz Quote.
(Swig 1 just taken....) Let me tell you about my half-brother: Leo. He's now 3 years old...... That's about it.
Next to me Spaz has begun playing "Pang". What a silly game.
[Get on with it!!! Someone else]
That someone else was Relayer, trying fruitlessly to get me to hurry up with my writing. Bad luck Rellie, I'm here for good...
Flash!!! Jochen Hippel is currently rewriting his synthesiser routine for the TT. Good luck Jochen, You'll need it.
(Swig 2 taken, bottle not empty, miscalculated, sorry).
OK Relayer, take it Away.
TNS
Editorial remark: What follows now is the only thing capable of beating the prose written by the average froggie: Something written by the Relayer (who obviously can't relate).
22:22
At last! That foul reptile has disappeared under the slimy stone he came from. I had to wait for HOURS (minutes, actually), because Nuttius Snakius kept staring at Tim playing "Pang", which is dead bori... ehhh... quite fascinating really...wow!... haha... err... where was I? Oh yes... errr... well! Anyway, I'm called Relayer (pause for standing ovation - thanks, Richard) and I'm in a crew called the Quartermass Xperiment (pause for silence. "Who ?", everyone cries in unison (they don't actually)).
Oh, all right, you probably haven't heard of us, but...
"Yaaarrrggggllll!!!!"
Tanis quote, after being insulted in Dutch by Richard
...we're partly part of Aenigmatica (are you following this? I'm not).
Aaargghh! Things are moving much too fast around me! I can't type it all in time on this &%$Ý"!!-German keyboard. Hmmm....maybe my incredible mind can find a solution to this problem.
Ha!
Well, there are loads of indescribable (!!) things happening all around me, and... neat, huh?
What weird ehhh... "music"...
"Thrash metal actually." Richard and wotsisname-who-used-to-be-a-Lost-Boy-but-who-found-himself are enjoying themselves tremendously, making weird, arhythmical movements to the music and shouting primieval screams. I'm enjoying myself by watching Spaz play "Speedball II" next to me and laughing very loudly (and continuously) when he loses.
Hahaaa!!!
Anyway, Aenigmatica didn't recently release "Genesys III" (The Unreleased Version) and all of you will have to admit it's totally brilliant, if it weren't for the fact that it hasn't been released. Too bad, guys! We'll release it in a year or two, perhaps, when the scene is ready for it... haha. Even though I'm not in Aenigmatica anymore, I did contribute some screens.
Everyone is drooling over the graphics in "Speedball II"...Tanis is trying to beat Spaz.... Crush is sitting at my feet and is happily prattling away (actually, he's wondering what "prattling" means. I explained and he seemed happy with it). I AM ACTUALLY HEADBANGING!!!! THIS IS NICE!! The primal rhythm fills my body and I can feel a scream rising up from the deepest and darkest depths of my soul, as I reach for my battle-axe. Slash!... Glaarrf.. Yaaggh... Blood!.. err... oh, the music stopped. It starts again!! Rrrraahhhh!!!! Killl!!! Murder.....Rape! Maim! Insult!... this is good... Crush thinks so as well, every bit of him, the bit near the door, the bit under the table, the bit stuck to the ceiling.
Yes, ladies and gentlemen, the traditional insulting of Crush is well under way, as Zokathra joins in the fray. "M C Lame!", can be heard from the cloud of dust which signifies the location of the awesome verbal battle. Never before has so much intellect been deployed against such a weak, defenceless (and drunk) person. Justice for all, eh ?
Crush is examining my diary, pretending to read, his curly head rhythmically bobbing up and down as he listens to a sweet tune only he can hear. He once again proclaims his deep and meaning-ful love to me. I yawn and push him gently away from my trouser leg. Enough of this (and of him. Pow! "Aarglll ?", Crush replies questioningly as he experiences something completely new, i.e. death. My generosity knows no bounds).
Anyway, people are screaming very loudly now. It's all getting very funny now. Enough, I'm needed for a performance now (video).
Ahhh... the burden of fame... enough for now... I must be gone. Hi ho Sliver!!!!! (sic)
Relayer a.k.a. King Of The Univaarrrgghhhh....
22:55
This is Crush. Anything that has been said about me is untrue. I'm not the perverted idiot that Relayer wants me to look like, I'm just a really nice guy and anyone proclaiming I have been, am, or will be drunk, is a complete liar. Zokathra is standing beside me with that 'I know everything' look on his face so I'll let him write some stuff (if he dares).
Crush (extremely drunk...)
23:01
Ah, finally I have a chance to get to the keyboard. It's extremely quiet downstairs, because everyone (well, almost everyone) has gone to the disco. I might have gone too, but, well, if you know these discos down here in the south... Anyway, it's nice to have such a happening here in Holland, so we don't have to travel for such a long time. Do it again next year, guys, so we can travel for free, thanks to this nice idea by our minister of education to give all students a card which enables them to travel for free with all public transportation for a year. Enough of this, let me give this keyboard back to someone with more inspiration.
Zokathra
23:08
I've been pissing my dick off today, it must be that Cola. I think I have drunk aprox. 5 litres of this liquid black death today. The crowd is finally starting to calm down a bit (I hope) 'cause I don't hear the eardrumraping hardcore anymore.
Roland
23:10
It has been a while since I've written for the last time, so I'm right back to entertain (???) you. By the way, I'm typing on a German keyboard and on this keyboard the 'Y' and the 'Z' have for a very ominous reason changed place causing me and a lot of others to get really pissed off some times. I can't get used to it in one day. And because I use the 'Y' a lot, I'm pretty annoyed now. But I guess there's nothing I can do, so tough shit.
If you haven't been able to attend this party, at least your brains haven't been spoiled yet. Geez, I can't find a normal healthy guy here. Especially An Cool is hopeless. Ok, see you later...
Martijn (Lucifer)
23:19.5
Hardyhar!!! I've just had a nice conversation with Erik from Thalion. I showed him my Official Role Playing Game Association badge, and (of course) he was totally flabbergasted, for he had never even met an Official Role Playing Game Association Member yet. But modesty is my middle name, so I just want to thank Erik for the enjoying conversation (outside, in the cold, but outside the listening-range of the Trash-metal that those crazy people like Richard play).
Let me just for the fun describe my surroundings:
- About 20 diskettes scattered left and right and above me.
- About 30 bottles of coke, many of them half full (or should I say half empty?).
- A cellotape dispenser (about 45 degrees to my left).
- A full jar of peanut butter (right behind the cellotape dispenser).
- A few bits & pieces of paper, one reading 'SPC-group' for example.
- A mouse.
- A Mega 2 ST (containing 4 Mb of RAM, ED.).
- A bag containing: 1 hot T-Shirt (hot in temperature!!).
- A Burger King Crown.
- An empty 'Mona Chocolate Mousse' bucket thingy.
- Several empty crisps bags.
- An empty 'Sinasappel Sap' carton.
- A Carebear member standing next to me who is called: Jas (thanx Jas).
- 10 Cd's, from several artists including Mylene Farmer (great looking broad!!!), Kate Bush and Jochen Hippel.
- 3 PC-engine games.
- An empty PiM's carton.
- An open window through which Several Tonnes Of Cold Air are currently flowing.
- 7 cups without coffee.
- 6 cassettes.
- 1 empty Lila Pauze wrapper.
- 1 diskette box.
- 1 knife.
- And a Relayer...
Well, just going for a P, and I'll be back soon....
TNS
00:12
At last it's past midnight and we're still up and coming here in Oss, it seems al quiet on the coding front, there's mainly just music and games being played, nothing interesting really.
Roland The Weirdo
00:19
Today, thus, is the third day. Deep feelings of inexplicable emotions shudder through the very centre of our beings.
Stefan and me have just filmed some really gory stuff. Really abhorrent. The stuff that makes it even more worth to get the one and only official ST NEWS International Christmas Coding Convention Home Vid' if you ask me!
We ended by waking up Spaz who had already retreated to the relative safety of the copying machine room. He started to scream, not stopping when told to. He looked glazy past the two persons that were suddenly sitting on top of him. He looked really pale.
I think we should not have done this as he was even more shuddered then we have just been.
Well, tomorrow we'll give him a free bottle of Coke.
Yeah.
Today is also the birthday of Fabrice Odero, Fury of Legacy. He is at the moment, as we have heard, held in 'custody' by the Alcoholica crew.
He will be 19 or something.
I guess we'll try to enter the underground circuit to congratulate him (if we can find him at all, 'coz other rumours indicate that he's out on town with some people).
I need to say one more thing: Get the vid'. It's worth it.
Richard
ENORMOUS LEAP IN TIME DUE TO A CRASH OF THE DISK CONTAINING THE ARTICLE. THE ONLY THING THAT IS WORTH MENTIONING IS THAT DURING THIS QUANTUM LEAP IN TIME THE "EUROPEAN DEMOS" GOT FINISHED, FURY GOT CONGRATULATED (AND SUNG TO) AND THE EARTH TURNED APPROXIMATELY 162 DEGREES.
11:28
I just heard that today is called the Pack up and go home day. Well, I think the guys from ST NEWS here have to put up with me a little bit longer, because my transport arrives on Monday at 12:00. And I don't think that Richard and Stefan would kick me onto the street! Would you? Surely not! ... Eh, OK, next subject.
"Does this SCART-Cable inspire you?"
TS quote.
My answer to the above quote/question is no. It doesn't. This is not because an otherwise good SCART-cable wouldn't inspire me, for had I been in another mood, I would have constructed a soliloquy on the qualities of SCART-cables. Or maybe an essay on the reproductive cycle of SCART-cables in the wild. But as it is, I'm in quite an uninspirable mood. The reason for this is: I haven't slept tonight. Not that it's anybody's fault. I just didn't sleep.
Fuckin' stayed awake all night!
...Sorry, I just had to air my emotions. Ahhh, it does one good to yell like that, even if it's only on a keyboard.
And the unimaginable is happening!!! I'm getting inspiration!!! I feel.... Hamburgers!!!! Argl!!! That reminds me! I also haven't eaten yet. RUMBLE Here we go!! RUMBLERUMBLE!!!! I've got to find something to eat!!! I'll leave the keyboard now or the sole purpose of my Quest For Food.
TNS
11:41
I woke up at about 11 this morning, after what has to be told was another very nice bit of sleep. The room on the attic was now even more crowded than friday night. There was 6719, ES, Mad Max, Martin Backschat, Bittner, Level 16, An Cool and another Swedish person.
Although it sounds terrible, it was pretty OK except for the occasional snoring and farting.
Then I got down here and I heard that the real-time article had crashed. This means that the period between somewhere after midnight and half past eleven has disappeared in an endless void of non-being.
All I can remember of what I wrote was that I was once again shuddered by emotions as I read the "Syntax Terror" official greetings and that ST NEWS was greetings last but (surely) not least.
It made me feel warm inside. So ST NEWS and this Convention are worth while after all.
When I came here this morning, I heard that the article had crashed but I didn't only hear that. No! The Overlanders have finished their "European Demos". Two fucking disks filled with astonishing demo material.
"The King Demo!"
Terence (Eric) of Pendragons quote
I immediately ran downstairs to beg Douge de Mauve to give me a special copy signed by all the Overlanders and Pendragons (and probably lotsa other Frenchies).
Yeah.
OK. I am now going to 'save and resume' this article. Let's hope it will then still work!
Richard
11:57
Hello! A little word from the Pendragons ... The "European Demos" have now been released; it has been real hard work for some Overlanders (everybody except Humungus in fact, who was sleeping all the time). No No !! Humungus, you won't stay awake later than me... We're now coding a little scrolling for the 3.5 kb demo competition. By the pangalactic bypass, Humungus and I will go downstairs to achieve this sixteen lines tall scrolling....
Terence (Pendragons)
Note of the co-editor: Which word in the above Pendragons entry has been replaced by which words by yours truly? Entries for this non-compo are welcome at any address you want.
12:03
Yoooohoooooo!!!! What about this fucking QWERTZUIOP keyboard. Where is the "Y" key (very hard to find)? This Convention is great. We have seen a lot of wonderful things during this meeting like a lot of very nice girls ("Nou ben ik dan toch wel afschuwelijk bijzonder benieuwd waar of die dan wel zijn gesighted", ED.). And of course we have seen the marvellous game "Enchanted Land" of Thalion. This game is really wonderful and impressive.
Our other screen for this Convention isn't yet finished. We have a lot of problems to put our 10 sprites 64*62 in one VBL but we hope it will soon be completed.
Eh! The "European Demos" of Overlanders are finished and it is really great.
Goodbye.
Crystar & Nemrod of Pendragons
12:15
I've just experienced how one can worship a bag of crisps when one is hungry. No f.cking snackbar open in town. I hate Oss. It's probably the only town in Holland without McDonalds.
Mouses turn into cheeseburgers and you can see prints of teeth on disks if you look very well. RRAAAAAAAAHAAAAHHHHH WANTOEAT!!
I understand that something has gone wrong with the real time article. Things were quite messed up, I believe. When reading what happened at midnight, you could suddenly read a story of what had happened at six PM. Well, Richard will check it out.
Just let him clean up the mess.
"Ik heb honger!"
Relayer's quote.
"Opdonderen. Rot op!!!!"
Stefan quote.
My legs are trembling. Fear fills my body. Let's get outta here!!
Martijn
12:23
So I woke up at last. At eleven or something some muscles of my body started making movement, groans erupted from my mouth, thereby nearly suffocating myself on a terrible B.O. Some other noises in the room indicated that Tim and the guy from the Dynamic duo (his name temporarily escaped my mind) were also in the process of waking up. Some grapefruit juice that I kept somewhere secret managed to bring back the ability to speak and a few moments later I finally managed to assume the seatedness of my posture (Allemugaggies, Stefan, dat kun je toch geen Engels meer noemen of wel?!, ED.). Even later, I got up, washed and dressed.
The office was remarkably peaceful. People were sitting everywhere, serenely computing away and it looked OK to me. The only thing that happened was that we ran out of Coke. People were already roaming around the office, searching for bottles containing the black fluid, but more and more ended up asking me about it. So I decided that the time had come to use my backup, 10 more crates. After that, there will be NO more Coke. So people will have to buy their own on Monday if they want any more. I think 35 crates (420 bottles) is about enough.
Somebody just put up Carcass on a rather large radio and I must say that the chaotic noises erupting from the machine are a bit unnerving. I think it's time to split.
Stefan
12:33
Well after a fuckin' sleepless night because of things to finish I finally decided to sleep, but there was no place left and if you put yourself in the middle others are walking on you.
Well right now Richard is shooting some kind of human trying to imitate skinhead muzic with little background muzic of 130 decibels......
Waouuh it's bloody savage....Some are staying quiet either because they are like that naturally or because they are tired. I've tried to make a 3.5 Kb demo with mouse sprites, Atari font scroll, rasters and 20 stars...... First of all nothing was working and when it worked with the help of good coders it was taking 9.5 Kb - aaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrrgggggggghhhhhhh!
AWARD! AWARD for the one who will find a normal person in the Lost Boys crew.
It's impossible (just have a look at Spaz or Sammy Joe).
Perceval from ZUUL
12:54
Roland is an All-Cola-list.
Richard
12:58
Read this, and read this well, for it may be the last I am able to write. Several creatures (including TS, Lucifer and the MEGA ST I am writing on) are rebelling against my voluminous writing-style.
Q: How can you recognise a Lamer?
A: He has troubles removing the cap from a coca-cola bottle
Q: How can you be sure?
A: Let him do the Lamer-Test in the new Delta-Force demo "Syntax Terror".
"AAAAARRRRRAARARARRARAGGHGHGHGHLUGLOIOLURIPLOILS'"
CD, Lucifer & Richard Quote.
I hope that the words I write now will be understandable, because the music that is slamming across this room is of such a volume that I can't hear what I'm thinking!
Thanx Richard for turning down the volume.
Crush is an Asshole (Obligatory insult to a member of Aenigmatica).
Why does everybody here have large quantities of cartons filled with yoghurt? If there is one cow-related beverage I don't like, it's yoghurt! Especially magere yoghurt (yech!!!!)
Bad news: I had expected to receive "Maggie" issues 3 and 4 this convention. Sadly, Sammy Joe didn't have time enough to copy them for me, so I will get them in our P.O. Box (which is, by the just paved intersection, P.O. Box 694, 2270 AR in Voorburg, Holland).
"I'm no asshole!"
Crush Quote
I hope I don't get the female population of Atari-land on my neck for this, but the first one of these species has just been sighted here! (Rejoice! rejoice!)
TNS
13:17
I'm indeed no asshole TNS! Speaking of assholes - you want a little joke about them?
Man, to a girl walking into the bar:"He babe, I'd sure like to get into your pants!"
Girl:"No thanks, I've already got an asshole in there..."
Damn, still no inspiration, even though I slept about 6 hours. I'll let someone else say something...
Crush
13:32
Oh no, still Iki on the keyboard...
Today me and the members of Hysteria decided to make a screen which would contain some autographs of the most famous guys in the CP... And we are also taking photos... Oh no I've no more photo free in my camera !! (so I can't take a photo of my God Mad Max the best rhaaaa sniffffff).... Bad luck...
Babaouiillllee...
(Whatta reli-nut! ED.)
Iki
13:36
You will not believe this but what you have read above is true. There is a female roaming around here, and she's located in the TLB and TCB room. I suppose it's the girlfriend of Ex-Softrunner and Ex-Hotline member (and current games coder) Dave Boshoven from my birth town Helmond (which is a shithole, really, down way south in the Netherlands).
Stefan has just already cleared off some of the accumulated garbage in the office. Thank God that he had the idea to do this. Suddenly, the air is a lot better to breathe and it is once again possible to see each other when you're sitting on opposite sides of one table.
Downstairs, the scent of a night filled with farts and snoring is wearing off. At half past eleven this morning, I went down and I was hit by an invisible wall of goulash-fart smells that struck me like a gigaton of solid concrete.
These Frenchies certainly have problems with their metabolism (just like me, as a matter of fact).
As this female is sitting in the immediate vicinity of me, this means that I can't fart and burp any more, nor yell subsonic death groans (the kind of groans that are inaudible but do give the groaner an acute headache) or anything like that.
I am now sedately sitting here, completely numbed by a bit of a package of painkillers (not the actual package, you dumbo).
Dogue just brought another bit of stuff to merge. This will follow now.
Richard
Note: The following was typed in earlier, downstairs on a French keyboard by Dogue de Mauve of the Overlanders. It will now be merged into this document. The good thing about this is that he actually wrote it during the time that was lost due to the crash.
By the highroad: I do now understand why the crash happened. I gave Dogue a copy of "1st Word Plus" (which is also the disk on which all this shit is saved) and I did this with "ACopy". As you may (or may not) know, "ACopy" does NOT update the serial number of the target disk.
Dogue gave me the article to merge yesterday, and since that involved reading and writing from/to two different disks WITH THE SAME SERIAL NUMBER this confused TOS terribly and screwed it up.
I guess we can thank heaven that the article we yesterday (which is 65 Kb in it's raw form) did was OK.
So: ACOPY IS THE FUCKING BALLOCKS' SHITTIEST MOST PUTREFYINGLY PURULENT SHIT COPY PROGRAM THIS SIDE OF THE KNOWN GALAXY!!
(Shove that up your anal muscle, Eurosystems!)
(Here starts the bit by Dogue)
"01:07
WAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHRRRRGGGGHHHH!
Here's Dogue de Mauve again (as promised). I don't know if some other OVR-or Pendragon-members already wrote it, but the "European Demos" are finally finished (with just 4 months, 11 days, 9 hours, 38 minutes and 15 seconds of lateness).
You cannot imagine (or can you?) how hard it was to have it running (nearly) perfectly. I reckon that Mr Bee & MCoder made great work with the protection (they were still coding when most of us had left to sleep). Thanx, guys!
Now, I guess that the Overlanders will rest a bit before our next demo (although there could be another demo with all screens that weren't used in the "European" in a few months). Our next project is the "Poseidon Demo", a big one that will probably take one year before releasing (see ya next Xmas!).
By the way, we will perhaps also take part to a few demos from various crews & guys...
Did I talk about the "Syntax Terror" demo? No??? Too bad!
It's a great demo, very well finished and generally brilliant (many guys are addicted by the SHANGAI-like game).
Congratulatons to all guys who took part in it and especially to Delta Force who organized everything...
The TCB guys left us this morning (too bad, I was sleeping and couldn't say "Goodbye!") and so did Sammy Joe from the Lost Boys. But there are still lotsa great guys who will stay until tomorrow afternoon (I hope I can take a few nice pictures).
I would like to send a special mention to Stefan Posthuma (also called "Stef the post") who organized this convention. I mean, his role is vital. He spent his days organizing everything, gathering all garbage and empty Coca Cola bottles and so on...
This is boring as hell can be and I must say this guy deserves our consideration and respect (we shall show him that we care about his work there...).
OK. Ziggy and MCoder need another machine to finish their 3.5 Kb vector graphix demo so I'll have to stop here. Before leaving, since I'm not sure I'll be able to write more stuff, I would like to send a big "HI!" to all guys at this convention (no lamers, there!).
May the Mauve bless you all!
Dogue de Mauve"
(End of stuff by Dogue, resuming regular chronological sequence)
13:58
At last Bitchard Karsmakers is gone and I have a chance to write some shit down. Let's talk about "Speedball II", I just saw it being played by Marc and Dave and it's great! Everyone should buy this mega game, DON'T COPY IT! The Bitmaps deserve a well paid job when they're producing such quality stuff.
Roland
14:01
I agree with Roland. Of course, the version Marc and Dave are playing is original too! You know, Roland stinks. He should take a shower. There is no shower, so he must do it at the swimming pool. An Cool has deserted us already to rot here, but just before he left he invited me for a copy-party in Sweden. I don't know when that will happen, but I'll sure be there. Yeah!
Martijn
14:13
Once again I have some time to type some more in this article. All's still going well, I just handed out lotsa copies of my Message of the Day, telling everybody what time the food will arrive and that we have to move to the other office tonight.
Richard is still busy filming everybody for the vid'. I think he just did the Sprits of Doom, the notorious Dutchies who have desecrated this article more than once. According to Richard, they were quite funny. But I think that the most hilarious one sofar is the one by Alcoholica. I had pains in my stomach from laughing when filming that one. Just wait for the vid' - it will be brilliant.
I think it is safe to say that this convention is a success. You don't know how much that pleases me. I had quite some sleepless nights over it.
The Lost Boys' plans have been changed a million times over the last few days. Tim and Fabian are now busy making a screen with stuff they planned for the Mega Demo (provisional title of course), but we learned that some other guys (Inner Circle, ED.) were doing things that Tim had already done, so in order to beat them, we have to release it NOW. So they are hectically doing it but who knows what will change now. Anyway, if they pull off what they wanted, it will be quite amazing.
"Aaaaarrrrrrggggghhh!!!!!"
Tim quote
Stefan
14:35
Yep, Stefan is right in the above: Martijn and me have been writing quite a lot during the past few hours, but since nobody else wants to do something we just feel a little obliged to add some helpful or not so helpful now and then. I want to notify you of the fact that there are two Amiga(yuk!) owners roaming around here, there's even a Amiga(vomit!) present here! Has Stefan gone stock-raving mad?! And above all those bleedin' Amiga(puke!) freaks even had the guts to turn down the volume of the ghettoblaster that's centred in the TLB&TCB room; I suggest we slaughter them and feed them to the pigs (like Inner Circle for instance). There's a very annoying person called Alex (from Aenigmatica) behind me who is very anxious to write something, so before he starts to strangle me I'll just stop.
Roland
14:43
Back with a full stomach am I, Le Nutty Snake. We (Relayer and I) found food in the least likely place: An Ice Salon. After trying out unsuccessfully 2 snackbars, a Chinese restaurant and an Italian pizzeria, we spotted a few Convention-attendenders leaving this Ice-establishment, wandering off into the distance.
"Hey!" we thought, "What can be edible enough for those guys to go in there?". We entered, and to our surprise the building also contained a SnackBar!!! Saved at last!
Well, I'm going to try to make my own 3.5k demo now, so I'm off again, but not for long, as you will undoubtedly have perceived on previous occasions.
TNS
15:00
Here is Fishbone from the Vegetables typing... Ajrarn and me (from the ST Connexion) are going to leave very soon, so as to be back in Paris before midnight. The rest of the ST Connexion team will undoubtedly follow us soon, 'coz none of them want to be caught in the moving of 7:00 pm (the Convention leaves its current location to free the offices and clean them out). The "Bless Dis Mess Demo", that was supposed to be released during
this Convention (just as the "Syntax Terror" and the "European Demos"), isn't at all finished, partly because of the Ajrarn's unbeatable laziness, and partly because of Alien's (the coder of the main menu) very strange code... In fact, most of us spent this Convention drinking beer, doing a lot of nothing, and meeting diverse interesting people. The only members of ST Connexion that really did some work are Vantage and Krazy Rex, who interviewed lotsa crews for the French ST Magazine. Yet Belzebub is still desperatly trying to code a little demo for the 3.5 Kb competition, that could be really very great if he manages to reach the end of it. Oh. In fact, Ajrarn just told me that Belzebub just went to the swimming-pool with Mordor, and that he doesn't care a peanut about this fuckin' demo. Too bad. As for myself, I collected a few demos and the "Turbo Assembler", and tried to convince everyone that I was able to code in Assembler (which I can't).
Look out for the Poltergeist Megademo (and the Bless Dis Mess, har, har, har).
Fishbone
15:15
Finally someone who is French and manages to write in a way that doesn't need half an hour of extensive correcting and re-formatting.
Bless you, Mr. Fishbone! Come back for some more if you wanna!
Richard
15:19
Bitchard sometimes is really a droplul and he agrees with this too (Sure. I would be concerned if my physician said say this. ED.).
Roland
15:21
Merchandise orders are now pouring in like rain in a busted shed (or something like that; I'm bad at metaphores or whatever you call 'em). Lotsa T-shirts and a couple of these simply shocking vid's as well.
So I guess everything is a success so far, and this mass ordering means that some people are preparing for the final things they want to do before leaving.
This evening will witness a mass exodus the likes of which we haven't seen since the Jews left Egypt (or civilised people leaving Europe when it was ravaged by Huns and all that shit).
Actually, I suck at history (whether it's biblical or not). So you need not worry about me doing this any more.
Shall I write a poem instead?
"NNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!"
(Everybody quote)
Please let me. I need to do this. I feel the surge of creativism like food knocking at the wrong side of my stomach, queueing to be processed upwards in the direction of any loo that happens to be near.
"No."
Everybody quote (in a very resolute way)
Please. Plflflflfleeeaaazzzeeeeee..... (I hope this Roger Rabbit imitation will cause them to budge. I try to look endearing).
"Fuck off you maniac anti-poetic sod! Go and shove those poems down a john or something!"
Everybody quote (in a very threatening tone)
I start to shake a bit, and I sense fear running down my spine in a viciously violent way.
I decide not to recite any poems.
Richard
15:36
We have just now assembled a provisional jury for the demo competition of which the entries will have to be until just after dinner at the latest.
There is a cold sensation hanging in their air. Coders are frantically tapping on their keyboards, trying to meet the deadline. As far as I gathered, there will at least be three games to be entered. Michael Bittner is entering a vector-graphics based shoot-'em-up, New Mode and Chaos of the Delta Force will enter a 3.5 Kb "Archon" and Fury of Legacy will do a two-player "Tetris" ("Twintris").
Richard
15:47
After a very good night (with some nice girls....uhuhuhu!), we come back here to tell you how this STNICCC is so gooooddddd!!! We won't give our contribution to the 3.5Kb challenge, cause we lost our coder in a pub (he prefered going with some girls for practising a strange sport (....) and we're still waiting for him!!!!!).
This morning we had a good surprise when we discovered the "European Demos" from the Overlanders. Very great screens guys!! I think it's the best demo released here (but we are waiting for the ULM demo. It will be ready this evening! Wait and see..).
Okay, so see you this evening when the ULM demo will be over!!
Some guys from Hysteria, Burp! (sorry, it's the coke!)
16:13
Wow it's much better being where I am (guess where?) than being coding on a (...) computer (I'm so tired, I slept only one hour still now...).
IKI coder of Hysteria
16:29
Richard (The Kars) has just asked me to fill this article up a bit more and being his loyal servant so I will. "Syntax Terror", "European Demos", "Speedball II", ST NEWS, "Maggie" and lotsa things I can't remember right now keep me busy all day. In the following bit I'll describe a few thingies around here for the people that haven't been (able to be) here. I have been looking forward to this Convention for a couple of months. As soon as Stefan had told me he'd organize a big coding party somewhere in December, I asked him permission to come to this party and he said: "Well, what can two more people (TS and me) do for harm?" so here I am. Just walking between all the 'big' guys I admire very much. The Lost Boys, The Exeptions, Delta Force and a lot of others. Wow.
I can tell you: It's quite a nice experience. And maybe, in the summer, TS and me will go to a Swedish Copyparty. Wow.
By the way, An Cool is a great guy. Yo, An my man! See you!
Martijn
17:08
Food is in me. It tasted OK and the schitzel was gi-fucking-normous!
The deadline for all competitions has just been delayed to 19:00 hours tonight.
I just realised that I have been out of touch with the real world for about 48 hours now. This means that, principally, Saddam Hussein could by now be dictator of the world for all I know.
"Je hebt gelijk!"
Roland quote
"Dick is groß!"
Spaz quote
Shut up Dave. You're just a frustrating moron seeking revenge for the shock inflicted upon you during your first minutes of comatose sleep that was rudely interrupted by your fellow Alcoholica members and me!
Don't worry: We will not violate your wish not to include it (the bloodshot white of your eyes was too frightening that it would probably put people off their meals for several days after seeing it). In the official vid' that is.
To the left of me, where Tanis used to sit (just about), Douge de Mauve is having a look at the Double Dutch Crew's Omikron Basic demo - which is basically a full fledged demo like any current mega demo but written in Omikron demo.
Richard
17:18
Oh my God
I am a sod
And there's a pod
A launching pod
Of martians from the sky
Don't ask me why
'Coz I don't know shit
I am a little git
And Dave can cry like hell
En dat was 't dan weer wel.
Gotcha! I poemed a bit! Nobody actually noticed! I have triumphed over general mal-poetic visions throughout this little faerytale castle!
Bitchard (name optimized by Roland)
17:20
Kars' poems are - of course - the third worst poems in the universe. Only things like New kids on the Block or listening to the stories of Ivo about his radio station are slightly worse. I have just eaten and I could sure use it. There are still plates, spoons and all the other things that are inevitable to eat. Stefan should clean it up a bit (har,har). No, actually I'm a very social guy. I have proof! I have brought Tim's plate to the kitchen. No, no, autographs only on thursday. Well, see you!
Martijn
17:29
The menu of today consisted of:
- Schitzel
- Huzar Salad (pronounced: User Sulud)
- Chocolate Dessert (or as we know it in the lowlands: vla)
- A (gigantic) piece of bread
- 1 packet of butter
- Indigestion
(And of course the cutlery)
Careful research pointed out that the safest way of eating the meal was:
1: Slice the piece of bread.
2: Cover the two (in-)sides of the loaf with butter.
3: Place the schnitzel between the two halves of bread.
4: (Throw away the salad)
5: Press the two halves tightly together (thereby decreasing the height of the packet to approx. 5 cm).
6: Open wide......
7: Close your eyes.....
8: Hold your breath.....
9: Bite!
10: (Result: Yum or Yuk....)
But The Lost Boys came up with another way to handle the situation. Decide for yourself which you like best.
1: Soak your bread in Cola.
2: Rip open the loaf.
3: Pour ketchup over both halves (2 bottles should be enough).
4: Throw the Schnitzel onto the two halves from approx. six metres distance.
5: Jump onto the combination.
6: Rub the salad into the mess.
7: Look at it.
8: Rub the resulting puke into it too.
9: Take a shovel and pick the mess up.
10: Throw it away and enjoy your meal.
After these enlightening messages from Maddhur Jaffrey, The programme will continue with:.....
WHY NOT?
Good evening, welcome to the part of this text where we ask ourselves: "Why Not?"
And today for our answer we have invited a distinguished expert on this field: Marvin the Paranoid Android.
Marvin, Why Not?
"First of all I want you to know that I have this terrible pain in all the diodes down my left side, oh ghod I feel sooooo depressed..."
Erm, yes. Could you....
"Brain the size of a planet and I have to be the guest on a stupid talkshow! I can tell you don't really want to know this..."
Yes we do!
"No you don't. I can tell that you really want to have adventure and excitement"
I can see that this conversation is leading us nowhere. I will therefore close this program with the message that next week in our program the guest will be Eddie your friendly shipboard computer.....
TNS & TS (The nuttiest Dutchies to walk the earth)
18:04
A little bit less than an hour to go before we will start accepting competition entries (and judge them). Just in the nick of time, Tim decided to enter a demo into the 'normal demo screen' competition - just to piss of Inner Circle as far as I've been able to understand.
So this means that this automatically excludes Stefan, Oxygene and Tim himself from judging these demos.
Therefore, a new jury has been appointed for this: This will be Slime (of DF), Level 16, someone of "Maggie" (disk magazine) whose name I forgot (I think he was called Timo), ES of TEX and me.
Richard
18:07
A private message from TNS: I am entering the 3.5k demo compo with the smallest demo ever written..... Come and see....
TNS
18:08
Just read on the door of Black Monolith & Delta Force's room: "Veni Vidi Vomiti" (which was written there by Daryl of those friendly chums at TEX).
TNS
18:13
I just went to the loo and I beheld something excoriatingly purulent (or something like that). Obviously, the repetitive use of the 110-piece male population of the sanitary availabilities here have had their effect.
They all lose one or two pubic hairs each time they piss. They each splatter around in the thing, thus making sure that approximately half a dozen of tiny droplets appear somewhere.
Everybody has a piss/shit about three times a day. There have been 2.5 days (this takes into consideration that the first day was only partly done here), so that adds up to over 2.5*3*2*110 (1650) pubic hairs, and 2.5*3*6*110 (4950) tiny droplets spread over four loos (which includes one ladies room).
Terrible.
The tension is now getting more tense (if you get my drift) by the minute. I even feel as if I have to finish some kind of demo myself! Spaz is doing some last graphics, and the Delta Force-and TEX rooms are off limits to those who have nothing to do with their attempts at winning the 3.5 Kb competition.
Tim's screen looks promising. It may indeed piss off Inner Circle (or is it "Inner Circumcision"?!). It actually includes music that Mad Max made AT THE CONVENTION. A rare thing indeed (Mad Max is normally a lazy bastard and it usually takes weeks for him to finish even something as rudimentary as a sound effect file for a game - Tim can tell you all about this).
Richard
18:30
I just delivered my 3.5k demo by Richard, so if I don't win on account of loss of demo, he is to blame.
TNS
18:35
It's real quiet inside the building except in the TLB room - in here it's a mess, the table is completely covered with disks and Coke bottles and everybody is trying to talk at the same time resulting into this massive pile of noise. I wonder, are TEX really inside their room working on their 3.5 demo or are they just sleeping, boozing or having a good wank?
Roland the insulting
18:44
Oh no! I have to leave! Nooo! No longer can I laugh at all the other demos (understandable if you've seen "Genesys III"), no longer can I scream very loudly, or insult Crush... hang on. He's driving me home! I can still insult him along the way!
Great!
Oh, he's breathing in my neck now... uh-oh... no, don't. Crush! No, stop that! Ahhh...ahhh...AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHRRRRRRR..... nice...
Only Crush can scratch my back like that. I hope you didn't think he was doing anything else, we're not like that, not at all, not us, no. We're always very gay... err... happy! Happy!
Enough of this! To prove I am not in love with Crush, I'll hit him in the mouth.
"Bam!"
Fist quote
"Ouch! Oh thanks!"
Crush quote
Seriously now, eiowusrgzjfwiofkweopgk5994578zu8f irjdtw465rGEGASRHRZ875874!!!!
Wheeeeeeee!!! Agnagnagnah. Do we sound like the Replicants yet?
Anyway, merry Christmas and a happy New Year to the lot of you. It was nice to be here, especially since I was here as well, I know. See you all in various demos, other conventions and whenever.
Relayer a.k.a. Master Of The Whip... err... Code-God Of Holland
18:57
Only just a few minutes before the competition starts, Richard or Bitchard hasn't started to throw us out of the room, so I wonder what's wrong.
Aha, a friendly mortal has just informed that the competition is yet again moved, the deadline is now at eight o'clock. The Nutty Snake is criticising my English, I reckon he ought to shut up.
Richard just threatened to kill me if I continue to call him Bitchard, so I'd better quit insulting this innocent human being.
Roland the never ever insulting anymore one
19:00
Angeeeeeeeeeeeeel Faaaaaaaaaaaaaaaace! Raaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhh!
Er.......well, though Hotline are near me, it still makes me think of crappy stuff...
Zae
19:04
This is Mr Mac from S.Y.N.C and HAQ from OMEGA making a small contribution to this massive textfile. We are typing this text in the funny town (Oss) where the shops are closed today and we can't get hold of any breakfast! We just want to say that the McDonald food here in Holland doesn't taste as good as in Sweden. I just bought a copy of the Mad Max compact disk and I think that you should buy one!!!
Now for some HAQ-typing!
When we went here by bus I had a terrible cold and I felt really bad. Anyway I am now feeling very well but almost everybody else in Omega and Sync isn't feeling very well. Talk about some real virus-spreading. Our last hope is a new version of the virus-killer from Karsmakers (car-maker?) that can handle this very nasty virus.
Omega and SYNC are both going to buy the new monster-machine Atari has developed, the Atari TT030. So if there is anybody reading this and has such a machine please contact us immediately.
If you want SYNC and OMEGA to develop good programs in the future, you should support us by sending in some donations. If you want the adress, just contact ST NEWS!!
We think that this convention in Holland is the best foreign convention we have been to!!
One of the best thing about this convention is that here are only real hackers and no lamers!!
Merry Cristmas from Sync and Omega!!!!!
19:40
You can't imagine what a mess this is here. Looking around I see the tabel invaded from about 20 half filled and 10 empty bottles, 500 disks and all kinds of cables and other stuff.
This report was broadcast to you by Acco to the TGE
19:44
Oh boy. Things are now surely getting hectic here. Everybody is trying to add bits and bobs to their demos or pictures, and everybody is just generally freaking out in a way I have only experience before when Bittner was trying to finish "Leavin' Teramis" at 4 o'clock in the morning, after crashing his Master Control Program ("Leavin' Teramis" is a Thalion game in case you're so minddeafeningly stupid not to know).
Good. I am getting off again. I don't want to miss out on any of the disgusted faces of 3.5 Kb programmers that suddenly find they have major bugs or something (I have my camera present!).
Call me a sadist, for I think I am one.
Richard
19:47
Stefan has just told me the most essential thing. I'm trying to code a waving logo but was stuck on one tiny thing. Stefan has explained it to me. I think I know it now. I'll try it at home at once. Also I'd like to thank Stefan, for helping me with coding and supplying me with ST NEWS. Thanks, Guy! And also greetinx to Richard Karsmakers. He's just great. He speaks very good English and German and can type amazingly fast with only two fingers. Even faster than me with ten fingers. Thanx guys!
Martijn (Lucifer)
19:55
Five minutes to spare guys! Delta Force just came in. "FERTIG!", they all yelled. I think this means that they have finished their demo. So now it is up to Bittner and the rest to finish their stuff. In a matter of minutes, the climax of demo coding will take place.
Richard just took the guys from TOS to the railway station. He went to the toilet and when he comes back....3.5K!!!
Stefan
19:59
Delta Force is ready with its screen ! What ? You don't believe me? I know it sounds like a miracle but here it is: It's finished and fuckin' great !!! NeXT's screen is also soon ready:
We find its name and now just have to code it... Burp. By the Merry Christmas - Joyeux noel - God Jul - Fröhliche Weihnachten - Vrolijk Kerstfeest !!!!!!!!!! Happy new year - Bonne annee - Gott nytt aar - gelukkig nieuwjaar - Fröhliches Neujahr !!!!!!!!!!!
(Sure, sure, ED.)
ZAE and Sync
21:02
Judging is very hard. We have just spent half an hour and we have only done the normal demo screens and the pictures. The 3.5 Kb screens have yet to be done, and Bittner still didn't enter it. because he spent so much time, however, we feel that he should deserve some extra time (if you don't agree then fuck off).
We'll soon do the 3.5 Kb screens, as the mob outside of this room is getting restless.
Richard
21:52
Over one hour late, we are about to judge the 3.5 Kb demos. Bittner was 1.5 hours late and has thus, unfortunately, been disqualified. However, he will have no reason to complain as he will get plenty of prizes!
OK. I guess this will be the last thing (approximately) for me to write in this part.
In short:
Normal demos: 1) Manikin, 2) Zae (coded by Lem), 3) Dynamic Duo.
Pictures: 1) Thorsten Mutschall, 2) Ex equo Dave (TLB) and Red (Omega), 3) Krazy Rex (ST Connexion). Special bonus prize for Douge de Mauve (Overlanders) for a very funny picture.
Three-and-a-half kilobyte demo: 1) The Delta Force, 2) The Dynamic Duo, 3) Ziggy Stardust and M-Coder. Special bonus prize for Michael Bittner (which nearly made him weep, I saw) for making a fucking great little game that just happened to be too late.
"No Second Prize..."
Ziggy quote
Richard
00:31
It's already well into this fourth day, and up to me is the joyous task of describing what has happened in the recent two hours or so.
Immediately after the 3.5 Kb competition results (which are to be read in the last bit of the real time article about "The Third Day"), everybody slowly started packing their things. Many of them then left for the ITC office (where we have been virtually all Friday), and many of them left to head for home.
The 'goodbyes' were sometimes emotional. Friends that we will not see for a very long time, friends that we would not mind having around another day, etc.
I know it must sound slightly exaggerated, but these computer freaks are really like one big family and it showed that nobody actually wanted to go away.
My colleagues at Thalion suddenly looked at me with a different gleam in their eyes. "There is something good in this chap all right," I could almost read behind their pupils.
It was a mass Exodus that was bigger than the Friday one. Now, all people were actually leaving, and they must have been approximately 120 or so. I guess that about half of them are now here. ULM is trying to finish their megademo, which among others features Tim's award-winning entry in the 'ordinary demo' programming competition.
Never will I forget the applause Bittner got for his 3.5 Kb screen. Or the one Stefan the Master Editor got when I told everybody what he had done and what a terrific pal he actually is.
Douge de Mauve (NFDDM: my name is D-O-G-U-E, not DOUGE!!!) of the Overlanders gave this Best Of Master Editor And Convention Organisers a bottle of white Bacardi rum, and TNS of Aenigmatica give him a completely unexpected (and very spontaneous) hip flask of Plantiac, the Divine Fluid.
I could see he was touched.
Chris (of the Watchmen) clapped.
Then the whole office needed to be emptied, cleaned, and tidied up to look like its original state. This meant that all 430 bottles of Coke, a hundred bottles of beer and various other assorted bottles had to be cleared away. Then there were enormous amounts of empty crisp bags, cartons, and even more.
But lotsa people actually helped: NEXT (I was amazed at this), the Rectal Erectables, some ST Connexion people, TNS and various other people that really deserve to be mentioned honourably but that have actually been forgotten by me.
Sorry.
I helped as well, of course, and Gerrit Jan of SPCC also came later.
I am going to quit writing now, because:
A) I am slightly getting out of inspiration.
B) I am getting tired.
C) Other people want to write.
D) Roland just farted terribly (ough).
Richard
01:11
Well well well.
When coding is too hard, when you're too lazy to open your suitcase to get your "brigable" bed and having a sleep, when "Kick Off" becomes too intellectual a game for you, when you're about to make a big mistake or to kill yourself, there's only one hope:
(Oppresive muzic background) It is ST NEWS stupid real time (not precalculating) article...
So here I am.
First of all I've to say that you are very courageous, because you read lotsa Kb of stupid bullshit article to reach this one...
Well at his kind of writing you may analyse a man: For example, Richard is always speaking of burping, toilet and so on (disgusting animal); there are also the one who really got nothing to say (me!) and The Nutty Snake who has monopolysed this chair for hours, sleeping on it because he was afraid of an hypothetic guy who would type bullshit instead of him (I've got to admit he's really good at that !!!!).
Well, in front of me, a white "black board" is standing with a lot of things writing on it speaking about SEX.
Well here are Doclands from OVR and STWARS from NEXT asking me which journal this article was made for and why it is for.
Metaphysical question, after have spending 4 days here (note from Doclands, he's lucky, I haven't got any gun to kill him.....).
Some people are understanding quite quickly.
Well, Mit from NEXT asked me to greet him, so I'll do it (poor Mit, he's unknown (I'm pissed off of ZAE too)), but let me describe Mit: It is an athletic two meters tall typical Swedish playboy, who is really good at coding and cracking. It is the one, THE ONLY ONE who brought the really nice "Maggie" charts, and the ultimate and fastest cracker and swapper in the universe.
Well let's say it is EXACTLY the contrary of what I told you.
Here is DOCLANDS behind me trying to understand the deep and philosophical senses of what I'm saying...
It's becoming more and more stupid...
I leave you.
GOD ON THE UNIVERSE: Ziggy (ooouuuuupppsssss).
The ultimate burper: Perceval from Zuul signing the stupidest ST NEWS till Doclands will type one.
01:45
Yo eveybody ! Here is Doclands, the musician of the Overlanders. AAARrgh, stupid keyboqrd...
Well, I haven't got anything interesting to tell you... So, enjoy the "European Demos"!!
Just before, you read Perceval; What he said is absolutely false: God is not ZIGGY, it's ME! (arf arf!)
That's all... May the force be with you...(I mean, FORCE MAUVE, you know, DOGUE DE MAUVE!).
Bye...
Doclands
02:00
Hi there , here is Mit from NEXT (you remember?), so the Convention has now finished, and I can see (near me): Manikin who is playing "Golden Axe" (lousy game), some guys of Aenigmatica, Zuul, and a Swedish crew is watching Manikin.
We (STWARS & MIT) want to go out to find some beautiful girls to fill the end of this night, but Zae doesn't want to join (you know he's got some medical problem). I think we will go to the pub anyway (or somewhere we can find 'free-girls'). I especially want to tell you something about this nice country.
There are many girls, but not like in the others countries: 1% very nice girls, 9% nice girls, 20% not so bad girls, 50% just girls, 10% bad girls, 10% it doesn't look like girls.But here are 99% nice girls....
So bye... Someone will type & STWARS will correct my bad English (no he won't, it was me, ED.)
Seen you soon in another message (no you won't. You're crap, ED.).
Mit (Monstrously Imbecile Typescrewer, ED.)
02:14
There's nothing as cool as cleaning four bearded loos filled to the brim with piss, Coke and shit. And that's what I have just done.
Yeah. I have been back to the little castle just now, and helped Stefan the Posthuman, Chris of the Watchmen and Marc (Genital thingy).
It was really bad. I was thoroughly disgusted most of the time.
Thoroughly in a very thorough way, that is.
It nearly made me violently ill.
Richard
02:32
I just corrected the bit written by Mit, just up here. It was so bad that I temporarily lost control of rudimentary subtleness. Sorry Mit but you should write anything but English (this is nothing personal)!
My God. It's awful.
My neck is starting to ache a bit as well, as this table is not exactly at the right height. And I'm getting to be very tired.
Oh. I forgot to mention that we had a visit of The Law just after I arrived here for the first time. There were two coppers armed to the teeth, and they thought it was kinda strange that there were lights in this office, where there normally weren't any (at least not on Sunday night).
I explained everything to them and they disappeared. They had disappointed looks on their faces: No shooting today (at least not for them).
Richard
02:35
By the way. Asking for the way I spoke with one of the often mentioned beautiful Dutch girls. Her name was "Manon" and I should call her when I lose my way the next time (Tel. 04120-xxxxx (this has been censored, ED. If you want to puzzle: The numbers in this are 23461 in the wrong order). Perhaps she will help U too?
Acco of TGE
02:41
Warning!! I just heard that Martijn is mentally preparing himself for a considerable amount of bullshit that needs to be written in here, according to him. So if you're not really into slap gelul (that's Dutch for bullshit) skip the next few pages.
Roland
02:44
Yezzz. I'm back!!! Now I could see the glance in your eyes showing a tiny amount of hope that I would have been gone or something. OK, let's get on with it.
First of all I want to say that I'm extremely happy because Tim has greeted us (the S.O.D.) in the new demoscreen "Twiddle screen" coded by Tim and Fabian (Oxygene) and with graphics by Dave.
Wow.
There have been some French guys typing a lot of shit somewhere above and thus disabling me to write here. After that, Richard (some weirdo) and Roland wished to write some small things and finally it's my turn. I'm getting pretty used to this f.cking keyboard. Shit!
Now I have the opportunity to write in this amazing-and-most-of-all very-long-real-time-article and now I don't know any more crap to write. Let's ask Roland.
Roland pointed towards Dave and Genital Grinder so I guess I'll inform you that they are playing "Speedball II". GG doesn't like the ball in the game. He wants to kill the enemy and not score.
Richard is going to bed. I will follow his splendid example within a few minutes. Alex is asking me for the tapes of the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy to listen to them until nine o'clock AM. I think this convention was just a little too much for him. Poor guy. OK. Now let's go ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ.
Martijn
03:05
As the noontime of Monday the 23rd of December draws closer, the saga of the ST NEWS International Christmas Coding Convention comes closer to its end. Almost 100 hours of sheer bliss have passed this mind. And not without leaving its deep impression.
(by the muse, I write this now, because I don't know if I will be able to write all these feelings down later) (see, I just got interrupted by Snake, and now they're gone..... Maybe later).
I think I'm going to listen to some 6 hours of Hitchhikers Guide tapes now. I'll see you later.
TNS
03:19
Roland back for some more of that good shit, the shit you just can't fuck with!!
Marc and Dave are currently playing "Golden Axe" which I think is one of the most crappiest conversions I've ever encountered. It doesn't look at all like its arcade parent. The only nice thing about it is that if you beat down a female sprite she dies with this real horny scream, falls down and spreads her legs. I'll just have a sip of Coke now....
Alex is now trying to get his walkman working so that he can listen to some Hitchhiker comic stuff. Tim is coding and I think coding is absolutely shit compared to graphic painting. Martijn is looking over his shoulder at the code Tim is working on and judging by the look at his face he doesn't understand shit of it. Perceval wants to write something, but he isn't allowed to write cause he makes too many faults in his English grammar. Richard has spent hours debugging his previous bits in this article. Marc wants Perceval to burp, but he refuses to do so, I wonder what Marc will do to him. He doesn't do anything!! He's a coward bastard!! Why should he be afraid of some French lamer who doesn't even know how to code?!!
Roland
03:32
Well I refused to burp because if I would, I would have made a smelling pizza on the floor. What else! Well, the fucking bastard called Roland is well placed to speak about lamers; he is the world's lamest leader. Well, Shadow from the Dynamic Duo is now sleeping, and he's not so bloody dynamic.
Perceval from Zuul: The Ultimate Burper
03:48
Hi, this is now STWARS of NEXT on keyboard.
We just went out for a while, but Oss is quite boring at this evening, and we had no car for tonight, so we're back.
Well, I don't know exactly what to write, cause I don't like bullshitting.
I think Holland is a very nice country: Lots of very nice looking girls there; we've been in a big disco yesterday and met lots of them...
I would like to go back to Holland just for that.
Well, except for that, I code when I've got some time (that's why some people say I am a lazy man, cause I don't touch too much ST (there are better things to feel !)).
OK, that is all for this time...
See you in another text...
P.S.: THERE SHOULD NOT BE ANY FAULTS IN THIS SHORT MESSAGE !!
(Yes there were, ED.)
STWARS
04:20
Tim just came into the room saying that we should go to the opposite room and so we did. A guy had fallen asleep with his head on his arms. Another guy had drawn a dick and a sun on his cheek with a black marker pen. Immediately pictures were made. I can't wait till he wakes up. I wanna hear his reaction. Bet he'll be real pissed off.
Right. The way things are going now I probably won't get any sleep this night. I'll just have to see 'bout that when I get home.
Home....
It still seems miles away. Within 8 or 9 hours I'll be back and my parents and my brother will start asking the usual questions like "How was it?", "Did you have a good time?" and "Oh shit! Are you back already?" and the usual answers will follow:
"Great", "Yes, of course" and "Tough shit".
Martijn
04:34
After some small consideration, I am now again behind the keyboard. Yes, The Nutty Snake is here again to fill the lonely spaces in this file with strings of meaningful (sometimes) characters. Since we swapped buidings, let me first describe my surroundings:
- The room is about 5 x 10 metres large, and 3 metres high. Walls are made of dreary gray wood, or boring old brick.
- The doors are painted red. This must be to show the architect's awareness of the dreary construction of the rooms themselves, and shows that he is totally incapable of planning
nice constructions.
- On one wall there is a so called 'White-board', which gives us a clue to the original purpose of this room. But let us investigate further.
- The ceiling has 8 large recesses with TL-tubes in them. This proves that we are inside a classroom. This is reason enough to stop further dwelling on this point.
Some remarks written on the white-board:
"If labour is the answer, it must have been a pretty silly question"
"Sex is like a game of cards. if you have a good hand, you don't need a partner"
"Q: How many idiots does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: Lightbulb? what is a lightbulb?"
"Sex is lethal... die happy"
Oh bollocks. I Want to see ST NEWS Volume 5 Issue 2 before I go to sleep, but the color ST next to me is occupied. I will therefore interrupt this session to look at it on this ST. Bye!
TNS
ANOTHER BIT OF A LEAP IN TIME DUE TO A CERTAIN CRAZY REPTILE TURNING OFF "FIRST WORD PLUS" AND HIS ENSUEING INABILITY TO FIND A NEW COPY OF IT ANYWHERE.
08:58
Well, nearly time to leave now. Most of the freaks already left and it seems that in a few hours Karsmy will be able to type "THE END" down this article. To my opinion it was a great party, some problems time to time at the beginning but they were all solved by either the (bloody efficient) organising team or the freaks themselves. This convention is different from the one we had in Marseille on many points: There are much more people here, the organisation is nearly perfect, and both places here were quite big. The point is that I think our Summer Convention was more a holiday than a real convention, as everybody spent more time going to the sea and hunting girls than coding hardware scrollers...
Anyway, I learned a lot for setting up a convention and it'll probably help me a lot in planning the NEXT/Replicants Summer Convention part II. Well, it seems that I must leave now but before I quit I want to say thank you and good bye to everybody I know on the ST scene as I now stop all activities, you can now consider that Zae is dead (please don't cry before reading the whole text) and I'll just come back to life time to time to bore you a bit with this bullshit you so much like...
Last message: A new software label is gonna hit the scene, the story goes on...
Zae of Next
09:23
Awake again. Stefan is bringing the Watchmen to Schiphol ("Well, if they would have been assholes I would not but as they aren't I will").
Tim just walked through this room, and it would be a cliche to tell you he looks like a zombie but unfortunately he does.
Mit is sitting next to me. I just came into this room and he welcomed me with curses because he had read the bit way up (at about 2 or 3 it was written) and had thus read what I had thought of him when I corrected his "English".
"Oh shit. I'm soooo tired."
Tim quote
I suppose I'd better go and wash my face, as I think I am not entirely unlike a zombie myself at the moment.
Richard
Morning (something like 10.00) (It was actually 09:30, ED)
Well, please don't spread my word but Richard does actually look like a zombie at the moment (a blond one with short hair and glasses). So I guess I can forgive him for not mentioning my incredibly good performance in the graphix contest (I began my piccy two minutes after the contest was over). I keep on saying that I should have won the first price but these lazy bastards of graphix men didn't want to admit that a coder (even a GfA one!) could be better than they are...
Anyway, I think that GOGO's picture wasn't too bad, even if he forgot a few anti-alias effects. SPAZ' drawing is also quite good (but he uses too much colors, not like me) and I guess that RED is not exactly what you'd call a bad artist...
OK, it was just megalomania again! Sorry, I couldn't help...
I would actually like to thank the judges that gave me a prize (very cool calendar and perhaps a video tape) 'coz my picture is anything ("nasty", "ugly", "disgusting") but brilliant. By the way, the real men to congratulate in this contest are the guys from Delta Force. They managed something I didn't think was possible (is that English, Richard???) (Yes it is, ED.): A fully playable "Archon" game with nice graphix and animation. Bloody impressive!!!
The little shoot-'em-up from Michael Bittner (who was disqualified because of two hours of lateness) is even better, with great graphix and even a musak (actually not, Dogue, for he deleted some stuff to do it in 3.5. It was pretty damn good nonetheless, ED.). All this in 3.5Kb, of course! Hell, what CAN stop such a programmer? Nothing, I guess (or perhaps a fullscreen competition in less than 100 bytes)...
A bit of text about Stefan Posthuma as well. He was offered some tasty alcohol by all of us. A way to thank him for the generally great organisation (such a party would have been nearly impossible in France).
I also forgot to mention the demo contest, which was won by Manikin (and Oxygene, ED.) for his (their, ED.) bloody good twiddle scroller (full of professionalism). LEM from NeXT and Dynamic Duo also won a prize but I still haven't seen their demos.
What else? Well, the convention is now ending (the official end is for 17:00) and lotsa people are leaving. We (froggies) are going to quit at 15:00 but I would have liked it to be longer (it was too short and we couldn't talk with all guys we intended to meet - especially because of the f....g "European Demos" we had to finish!)
Let's hope we'll be able to go to the next convention and meet all guys outta there again (and some nice guys should visit us in Paris during their European Tour this summer).
OK. I think that's all for today. I don't know if I will ever write anything there again. So, I send my best greetings and christmas wishes to all guys outta here...
May the Mauve be with them all!
P.S.: and a special "Hi!" to Richard who actually reads and corrects everything in this text. Believe me, that's the total opposite of easy work (especially when you see how bad at "clean-writing" some people are - and using this strange Dutch keyboard does not make the things easier!).
(It's....er....well....German, actually....sigh.... ED.)
Dogue de Mauve from OVR
10:10
Maybe I should just quickly mention a couple of names of people who have just left: NEXT (including Mit - thanks whatever divine being that floats up there and that happens to be the father of He Who Has His Birthday Tomorrow) and the Delta Force (DF).
DF left us with a brilliant version of their award-winning 3.5 Kb screen "Archon" (2-player version).
Nice people. Nice game.
Richard
10:24
We will be going on An Utterly Holy Food Quest On Monday Morning. Maybe a quest that's doomed?
Richard
11:15
At just past eleven, we (Manikin, Spaz, Genital Grinder, Lucifer(tje), TS, Fury, The Nutty Snake, Tyrem and me) came back from the Food Quest.
The loot was incredible, and consisted mainly of crisps, some dairy products and a bit more Vieux. I got a little bottle of Plantiac (I'll give that to my dad, I think), and a bottle of a 3-year old "De Kuyper" French Vieux that, according to the salesman, "was even better" (turned out not to be altogether too good, ED.).
Richard
11:25
This might well be the last piece I write, because I will be leaving soon. At 12:00. But first a break, because I have to look up some train scheduals on a special program made by the Dutch train services.
TNS
11:40
This is definitely the last piece of text I will write. In about 10 minutes, I will pack my bag and get my coat, walk out the door and step into my father's car. Furthermore I will definitely fall asleep in that car (which is not a disaster, because my father is driving... heh heh).
"What do you call a camel without humps? -- A horse, actually."
Shadow & Spaz quote
These will be the last 5 odd minutes and already I feel the tears coming up. Goodbye Oss, goodbye STNICCC, goodbye everybody. And not least of all; goodbye to Richard & Stefan.
The organisation was brilliant. It was real nice getting to know you better. I hope I will remember to pay for the Merchandise. See you all soon. Goodbye!! (sniff...)
TNS
12:05
We just spotted Stefan, who arived back from bringing the Wankmen...er...Watchmen to Amsterdam airport.
He immediately went off again, together with Tim, to give Gerrit Jan a little present for putting up with TLB and NEXT during one or two (or three?!) of the night before we could sleep in the faerytale castle.
By now, the only people here are the Overlanders, Spirits of Doom, Dynamic Duo, Unlimited Matrices, The Respectacled Resettable Erectables, The Lost Boys, Fury of Legacy and Black Byte (from Switserland).
Genital Grinder is now more or less demonstrating "Power Monger" which, if you ask me, is the only game of its kind to beat "Populous". Brilliant. A game that should make Bullfrog millionaires (whether they are with Renegades or Electronic Arts or The Mutant Weirdos From Basingstoke).
Richard
12:18
I've just woke up, and I'm still very tired. Anyway, I'll try to write something. This convention is a real success, and before anything I'd like to thank the organiser who did work very hard to arrange everything. We just finished the "European Demo" one day before, and we did not sleep at all (nearly) since the starting of the convention. Well, we'll go back home in three hours, and I feel that it will be very difficult: I'M TIRED!!!
OK, I'm going to eat now, bye...
Ziggy ("le fucker a la hache")
12:30
Yesterday Stefan got a small bottle of The Divine Fluid Plantiac and he let me taste it. I liked it and this morning I have bought a small bottle of it myself. Wonder what my mom will say. I could buy the bottle in a store despite the fact that I'm not eighteen yet. I certainly will enjoy it at home, though I think I'll mix it with Cola or something. I believe that's how Stefan usually drinks it. If the bottle will remain full until home, because Stefan has spotted it and a twingle appeared in his eyes. I'll just hire TS to guard it for me.
In the opposite room people are still working on some kind of demo which I don't think will be ready today.
I just heard from Richard that it's called the ULM Mega demo. He doesn't think it will be finished today. They think they will. We will see. This night, I went to bed at about half past
five or something like that. I woke up at about nine o'Clock. A lot of guys haven't slept at all this night. I don't know how they can manage to stay awake all night. Well, lotsa practice I think. The white blackboards in all the rooms have been used to store even more serious shit. Weird drawings and zany texts. They were made within half an hour. People around here seem to have overloads of inspiration. Well, it looks nice anyway.
Musaxx from "Life's a bitch" fill the air. Great demo. Real neat peace of work. So long!
Martijn
12:57
Tim is dissectioning his system, meaning that the time for the second Great Goodbye (the First One was that of TCB, which I totally and utterly missed as they left early on Sunday morning when I was still suffering from a coma attack) is drawing nigh.
This is the real signal of the convention drawing to its end. But it's been worth every minute, and every ounce of trouble.
Stefan's here. He's slowly strangling me in order to gain access to this system's keyboard...
Gargl...
Richard
13:02
Finally some time to write some stuff. I just returned from a high-speed drive to the airport. I think I set a new record here. Oss-Schiphol in 1 hour and 10 minutes. Average speed about 150 kilometres an hour. Good thing the cops didn't catch me. I am now witnessing Tim trying to stuff his sleeping bag into his large suitcase. This means that he is leaving, and this party is nearing its end. The boards in this place have been filled with the most obscene and absurd drawings and quotes you can imagine. Right, Tim wants to go.
Stefan
13:03
Well I have not actually written very much in this mammoth real time article and since I am about to leave I guess that I will not be writing very much more. It has been a great 4 days and I am now feeling incredibly tired and looking forward to returning to a nice warm bed and about 3 days of solid sleep. Tomorrow is of course Christmas but apart from eating lunch I probably will not rise from my slumber. Well that's it - time to go to the station and catch our train to the airport. Byeeeeeeeeeee.
Manikin
13:07
Bye.
Spaz
13:08
Fuck off lamer shit turd poo wank.
Toxic
13:11
Lost boys are almost gone, think I'll leave soon too. Getting really quiet round here, am bored to death. Wanna sleep, don't think about nothing. When are those French people going to shut up, can't stand their bleedin' language. Think I'll quit now, this is probably the last bit I'll do in this enormous real-time article,
The last few days have been an experience I won't forget too easily, I guess. I've met or seen the most famous demo programmers ever to appear on the ST, drank more Coke than I'll ever drink in the rest of my entire life and have been awake for the longest periode of time ever. Right now, I'm sick and tired of typing, so I'll just quit for a short moment.
Roland
13:18
Silence rules the room now as the zany English have gone. All that is left in this room now is one strange looking French guy (Dogue de Mauve) and two even more stranger looking Dutch blokes who call themselves SOD. A huge void seems to have been created, even though Fabrice is trying to cheer us all up by mumbling some strange enchantments in French or something. Richard is trying to connect his Lynx to a power plug. He just found a converter but it doesn't seem to work. Hideous curses pass his mouth and he produces a pack of batteries from his briefcase while muttering something about charging them. I gotta go and clean up one of the rooms which has been deserted already.
Stefan
13:32
I hear some sounds outside that seem to indicate at the discovery of a vacuum cleaner.
I'm going to examine this.
Richard
13:32 (too, 'coz my watch isn't the same as Richard's)
Here's... Yes, Doguy again, typing on this keyboard. Richard just said that my name seems to be a contraction of "Dick" and "Cock". Am I supposed to be flattered? I'm not sure...
Anyway, Richard is a very nice person so I won't use my Force Mauve against him...
I would like to send thanx to everybody again for this very nice coding-party which is almost finished right now (I just knew it would be too short).
So, we'll leave in something like an hour and a quarter and I hope our trip home won't be too bad. The only problem is that Ziggy is supposed to go to Amsterdam alone by train to meet his parents and, knowing him as I know him, I'm not sure he'll manage it without losing his life or at least his wallet and ticket...
This is too bad 'coz we need him as a graphix man for our next demo...
That was my last message. Have fun with ST NEWS!
End of communication.
Dogue de Mauve
13:55
The repectoralled bespectacled testicles are going. The Godfather of bad logos is thus going, too (well, his logos used to be unreadable, but now they're OK).
So this is even more near to the end.
"The end is near.
Lucifer's legions of death
Are ready for the attack
They've got only one aim
Total Destruction....."
Destruction quote
"Blackened is the end
Winter it will send
Throwing all you see
Into obscurity
Death of mother earth
Never a rebirth
Never seen before
Breathing nevermore
Never!
Fire
To begin whipping dance of the dead
Blackened is the end
To begin whipping dance of the dead
Colour our world blackened
Blackened..."
Metallica quote
So this is it. Bye.
"The show is over now
And we will soon go
And the end is near
And I don't know how to rhyme
So I'm going to stop..."
Shit quote
Richard
13:59
Well, time to say bye to Richard and Stefan. ULM and the RESPECTABLES are leaving know. Thanx for everything!
Tyrem (Kimmi) (Kimster) (Hamster) or whatever!
14:04
WHATTHEFUCK?!
If ULM leaves, this means that their megademo will not be finished at all at this Convention?!
How can they do this to us?
I guess the end is near...
"The end is near.
Lucifer's legions of death
Are ready for the attack
They've got only one aim
Total Destruction....."
Destruction quote
"Blackened is the end
Winter it will send
Throwing all you see
Into obscurity
Death of mother earth
Never a rebirth
Never seen before
Breathing nevermore
Never!
Fire
To begin whipping dance of the dead
Blackened is the end
To begin whipping dance of the dead
Colour our world blackened
Blackened..."
Metallica quote
So this is it. Bye.
"The show is over now
And we will soon go
And the end is near
And I don't know how to rhyme
So I'm going to stop..."
Shit quote
The only people that will be left soon will be Black Flag, the SODs and the Overlanders. And Fury, of course (Fabrice won't let us alone - not even if we would have wanted this).
I really don't like the feeling that I won't see any of these terrific people together until next year.
Richard
14:10
Stefan is now hanging out of the window, yelling to Tyrem that he wants to buy a MEGA ST2. His dear OLD Atari 260 ST has not survived the Convention.
Richard
14:15
I know that everything comes to an end, but every time something dear to me dies, I find it so hard to accept. My ST. My faithful ST that has come with me such a long way. It is like losing a faithful dog. Tears welled up in my eyes as I carefully lifted the lifeless machine. Shocked I was when the cover gave away and the insides became visible. I sat down and closed my eyes. No more of this. This is the end of an era. The ST on which I programmed "The ArtiST" (a monochrome drawing program, ED.), I coded the first versions of the fast page view mode for ST NEWS, my first scrolline....my first borders.....djjdaeijj...e....3.......my first.....I......
Stefan
14:22
Stefan is at the moment doing heart massage to his poor 260 ST, yelling: "Come on! Breathe, you bitch! Don't leave me hanging it here all on my own! What about the kids?! I can't bring 'em up all on my own! At least explain me how I should iron my shirts! Come on! COME ON!!"
As a reaction to his ST showing no signs of life whatsoever, he ran away, tore apart the package of one of TS' 'stuffed carres', and viciously squeezed an entire one of those things in his mouth.
Terrible. What a pig.
By the alleyway: There turned out to be one bottle of Coke left!
About half a nanosecond after this was discovered, TS of SOD started to drink from it in a viciously violent (or violently vicious) way...
Richard
14:30
This convention was so great that I didn't have time to write something in this text. So here I am. I just want to write something to remember that I was here. Now approximatly two minutes are left to write something and with this shittttttyyyy keyboard it means ten words at maximum (French guys are really stupid or they are too inteligent for this QWERTZUIOP (where does the 'Z' key come from [is it a bug]?) keyboard?)
What else can I say about this convention : GREAT is the only word I found in my real poor English vocabulary.
OK... it's time to leave know.
GUDUL & ADSO
PS) Don't forget to read the text in the Gudul screen of the "European Demo" to win a carambar.
14:49
OK, here is Furyo on the keyboard (fuckin' keyboard!), it is just for telling you that the convention has almost finished, and it was really great. Hope ST NEWS will organise such a great convention again, and then we will surely participate once again.
And, once again, thanx to Stefan Posthuma & Richard Karsmakers (great guyz!).
OK, enough of craptalk, see ya in the "European Demos", CIAO!!
Furyo
15:00
Here is Silver on the keyboard and behind me there is Richard Karsmakers who tries to do the best BURP (is it good English?) (Yes it is, ED). Now it's time to leave and I can say to you that this convention was really great. And I lost something: My "serviette de toilette". Argh, I can't continue; it's too hard to type on this keyboard.
So bye bye and Happy Christmas.
This trip was my present and it was one of the best I have ever had.
Bye bye from Silver of Pendragons of Triton Dvp.
15:02
Yeah, this is the unmistakable Fury alone in front of the keyboard (how strange, no one has been bothering me with my feet odour - does this mean that my reputation of having man-killing feet is over? Great...). Well, we're about to leave for the train (fuck you Richard, he's just farted while walking past me. Richard, YOU are the smelly bastard!!!) station and go back to our beloved (uh?) country called France. I hope I'll be able to get back the 21 Hours of sleep I lost during the convention:
- 3 Hours sleep the night before the convention
- 3 Hours sleep first convention night
- 3 Hours sleep second --------------
- 2 Hours ----- third ---------------
Now, at a normal rate of 8 hours of sleep per night, it makes me miss a grand total of: 21 Hours (Did I succeed in boring you to death?).
Uh, well too bad, I'm now lacking inspiration, so I'm afraid you won't have to read this crap I'm currently typing on a f.....g QWERTZ keyboard. As it is very likely that I'll be the last one to write some stuff.
BYE BYE, the Convention is over...
Fury From Legacy (No more 'Smelly Feet Fury?')
15:24
No, not yet. The French have just all left for the train, and it was one of those partings you'll never forget (snif). It was exactly the same as the parting I had when I saw them for the last time at the Salon de La Micro (see ST NEWS Volume 5 Issue 2, the first "Undead" issue). There's something about the Overlanders that makes them instantly sympathetic.
They started as quite a lame coding crew, then grew better, and then started to code some real demo screens that could compete with all the large crews. Now, they are some of the best coders of France and I am honoured to have been able to make their acquaintance.
All people left here are now Black Byte (Dr. Diddle), Bytechangers (Fix), SOD (well you know these two weirdos by now), Stefan and me.
The silence is only crushed subtlely by the sound of TS playing "Tetris" on my Gameboy.
I am now going to copy a bit.
Richard
15:50
Well, what is happening now can really not be called a Convention any more. Stefan is already starting to clean up, and we are generally being bored.
My system will therefore now be shut down. I will then move it into my car, get back to help Stefke a bit and then drive home.
Sigh.
Richard
THE END (ENGLISH)
FIN (FRENCH)
EINDE (DUTCH)
FËRTIG (SWISS-GERMAN)
FINIS (ITALIAN)(?)
FLØPPØKLEPTÖ (SWEDISH)
ENDE (GERMAN)
WATER (GOGOGULPLEXIAN)
KILLSADDAM (ARAB)
ULUBULU (SWAHILI)
ÒÍÖÛ (HEBREW)
äïë (GREEK)
WANGSNEEPANGPANG (CHINESE)
HIROHITODODO (JAPANESE)
FISHY DIE AND THEN ICEBEAR EAT IT (GREENLANDISH)
PRETSKY VOORBIJSKY (RUSSIAN)
SO LONG AND THANKS FOR ALL THE CRAP (BETELGEUSIAN)
SIGH MOAN COME (TRIPLE-BREASTED-WHORE-OF-EROTICAN-SIX-IAN)
BURP BLERP FART (SPIRIT OF DOOMIAN)
VENI VIDI VOMITI (ANCIENT LATIN)
Epilogue
Yes, I know that there is hardly anyone on this orb we call earth that wants an epilogue, prologue, or monologue for that matter. Yet it is my firmest of beliefs that an event the likes of the ST NEWS International Christmas Coding Convention deserves one, even if no living soul bothers reading it.
Reflecting back on the Convention (which is aided significantly by the video shots and photos we made), I has to be concluded that the days on which it happened have been some of the most intense of my life. And not only have these days been intense - no, they have also been gratifying, thankful and fullfilling. The sheer thought that an ST NEWS Convention brought joy to the lives of so many people (including its organisers) makes one sense a peculiar kind of warmth inside that but rare individuals get to experience ever in their lives.
The Convention has been the best computer-related event in my entire life, and I think nothing will happen within the near future that will allow this incredible experience to be banned to one of the more stashed-away corners of my memory.
If you, dear reader, have attended the Convention, I would sincerely like to thank you for all your consideration, your behaviour, and your general being nice to everybody.
For me, the Convention was a once-in-a-lifetime experience. Something totally unlike any other similar events. It was unique. It was beautiful. It was intense.
It was the ST NEWS International Christmas Coding Convention.
Thank you for bothering to read this epilogue.